Oh Susanna!

Live Exceptionally

2012-01-18T23:37:00.000+08:00

Shallow Thoughts

So how do you say something like this? Don't judge me please:

Almost, wax lyrical about the new 7pm chinese drama "Scarlet Heart". It doesn't seem to be one of your run-off-the-mill period chinese dramas. The storyline sounds promising & modern (even though it's set in the Qing Dynasty). Toying with the idea of getting the DVDs. I know, indulge me for a moment. This is so far off my usual vernacular.

By the way, this soft fluffy bun (pao), oozing warm creamy golden egg yolk custard– DIVINE. All the more when it's brought all the way to my doorstep hehe. I cannot express enough– my tremendous support of my sister in her musical studies at NAFA.
--

Deeper (hopefully) Thoughts

More pertinent thoughts– been thinking about the quality of daily conversation, now compared to a decade ago. Doesn't it scare you that there are those who think it rational to build different castles in the air, every single day? Like where did the good people with lofty ideas and equally hardworking hands go? Why does this generation seem to think things will magically work out when they fail to study/ put in effort in anything they do? Don't even get me started about concentration & perseverance.

Striving with a few fellow girlfriends to be less self-centered, materialistic & overly emotional. To be critical about what we allow into our lives, to call out crap, be productive and effective. Such a joy to have friends that make you a better person. People that question their practice daily & who strive to live exceptionally.

Does it even exist

2012-01-18T14:11:00.000+08:00

"Not too mention a pretty great job. Although things with OCF were going well, it felt like there was something missing. You know when you date that guy, that sweet, funny guy, the guy you could list a hundred wonderful qualities about, but there’s just not that… as Carrie would say “zsa zsa zsu” factor. This started weighing on me heavily. Do I really need the zsa zsa zsu, does it even exist?"

Blueberry Pie

2012-01-05T14:43:00.001+08:00

I will make this blueberry pie by the end of Jan. Looks simple enough & absolutely delicious.

Other recipes on my radar:

So excited for the school break in Feb! :D

A few other things to get:

White porcelain Ikea pie dish
A pie knife (goodness knows where to find that in SG)
A cake stand ;)

Almost 2012

2011-12-28T22:07:00.001+08:00

My graphic designer prowess has staged a resurgence in my grey matter. Quite a handful of ideas swimming around in my mind, no anchor or chance to play around digitally. Miss design work. CANNOT help but pine for my iMac to make its way here. On a side note: I've always wanted to set up an etsy shop! When I get my new mac, I might start on making that dream reality:)

Ever so close to the new year, though not quite there yet. A few people have made dates with me for 2012, :o) pie-making with Ashley, breakfast with Glow, dinner with Jolyn, coffee with tammy&ashley. Perfect jump start to 2012. Overview of the year:

21st birthday (not too sure about this, seems so unreal)
Tioman trip to celebrate glow's commissioning (early april)
Study trip to Melbourne (May)
Graduation (Aug)
Start of full fledge working (bittersweet)
Maybe Europe Trip (a very big maybe there, but it's on the map)
Thailand Mission Trip (Dec)

Sounds daunting, thrilling & very much lovely, all at the same time. (On hindsight, it looks like someone's wanderlust exploded all over 2012). So many overseas trips ;) Note-to-self: Take on more freelance jobs to cover cost.
--

(tentative) New Year's Resolution:

Learn how to say 'No.'
Learn how not to settle with/ tolerate bullshit
Cook & bake more on a regular basis
Invest more time into certain people.

Christmas 2011

2011-12-28T20:10:00.000+08:00

A few assignments, a few suppers, a sunday or two & Christmas comes and goes. The shops launch fully into Chinese New Year & erase Christmas in a heartbeat. It's strange to think that such a mind-blowing part of history has been reduced to a day of merry-making and commercialized fanfare. Appreciating the truth behind Christmas Day is ever more so difficult during Christmas. Trees with embellished carousels, lights blinking more quickly than your eyes do, songs about 'Santa Baby' (that is official the worst Christmas song this year), ads bombarding you with 1001 ideas of what Christmas should be. It gets tougher each year. Just thankful to be able to invest time with those who matter this holiday.

Grateful for all the love.

Holiday Writing

2011-12-20T10:24:00.000+08:00

"I get really giddy when talented people tell me they are getting together with other talented people, because the result is usually pretty spectacular. "

" it’s the ultimate."

"Mixtape No. 5 : Shorter Days, Longer Nights

This mix is for cuddling beneath warm down comforters, sipping hot tea with lemon, shuffling around in wool slippers, curling up in oversized sweaters, watching city lights twinkle on the bus ride home, enjoying the stillness that comes with the first perfect snowfall … "
--

Love the way she writes– http://katearends.com/blog/

NOOOOOO!!

2011-12-07T21:41:00.001+08:00

Cheese of the month club, beer of the month club, wine of the month club, flower of the month club. Wish Singapore had that, it'd be so much fun to give a gift that keeps on giving throughout the year.
--

What's new? No one ever sees this coming, & I'm thankful I have most of my vital info backed-up, but still!! My photoshop, is customed for me, actions, brushes & all. MOMMYYYY.

Nothing like a crashed mac to make you feel completely depressed & helpless. Utterly devastated, lost & out of sorts. Never knew I was such a techie. Ughh to repair the mbp or not? There's just a bit more info in there that's not backed-up, not vital info, nevertheless a pain to live without/ a pain to look for again. I would pay the $120 to get that info back :( Or to get the 27-inch imac? But if it'd just last 4 years, and I'm gonna get a job by end next year, & I'd have another comp at work, this one at home will be quite under used. Considering an ipad2 when I'm paid for this current freelance job (not sure if ipad3 is coming out soon). Will probably get an iphone next year when phone plan expires too. Too much apple no?

Now I've got one more trick up my sleeve for the sleepy guys handling my mbp. Check the Nivdia graphics card, if it's the faulty one, if it is, but now the logic board's dead. How can you prove that it wasn't the faulty card that screwed up the logic board? Makes sense? #sosingaporean #sokiasu lol.

Bittersweet week that's for sure.

--

On a side note: Got a new pair of in between bush-nude sandals, after leaving the apple support place at wheelock. Thankfully not an impulse buy, the Bobbi Brown Lipsitck in Sunset Bronze would have been impulsive, still mulling over that hehe. Got to get on with life yes?

Funny what growing up does to you.

2011-12-06T21:47:00.000+08:00

I'd like to think I'm that bit more calm & collected. Calmer maybe not, collected yes (along with a better poker face). So the gent brought me along for his 'Army Intelligence Family Day' thingamajig & we were laughing over crusted sugar syrupy popcorn about how certain things were done. Made a deliberate attempt to engage someone in conversation, which the gent immediately noticed. He texted me to say he was very proud of me for doing so. Which made me realize that, we've have quite a different sense of each other now– knowing habits, common behavior in certain situations. Veering off character/ making conscious effort is that much more obvious & appreciated.

& when I got mildly bothered by his aloof and distracted disposition (due to not being able to fix his recording interface). It didn't escalate into a full blown cold war. Deep breaths, reminding myself of the way he processes things (the whole notion of intps living in their heads, esp when they are solving things), him asking if I was fine, getting over it. Back to usual self within 15minutes, without breathing a word about being perturbed. Quite a feat, really. & yes, was duly smothered with rainbows & hugs when he managed to fix the interface (score).

We're not in perfect harmony yet (still much to learn), but we did take our fair share of squabbles, tears & "I'm sorry."s to get thus far. & as we've learned– it's the small things that matter (because when unattended to, they morph into giant monsters).

Wearing pants.

2011-11-20T22:27:00.001+08:00

Amidst this mess of work, obligations, curiosity, love, kinfolk. Been with the guys too much, army-talk, encouraging them etc, thinking like a guy, turning a blind eye to certain things I would have been vehemently against. Bored out of my wits. Happened one too many times. Beginning to get these un-ladylike tendencies. Becoming one of the bros, in the worst sense of the phrase.

Seriously guys. So many of you come crawling when you need help, and believe me when I say that I help, hear you out, struggle through problems with you, only because I love you guys. & Love, enough to know that this is bad for you in the long run. You'd just end up never knowing how to go about things by yourself. & It's tough being the guy here. Can't keep spoon feeding, you need to swim for yourself. & learn how to treat a lady right.

Tough to always be the one you come crying to, for encouragement, for solace, while you save your compliments & adoration for the rest of the girls. Girl here too, so face the wrath of mood-swings.

Design Classmates.

2011-11-03T20:41:00.001+08:00

"And this is Eric's wartorn photo of us after his torturous field camp. It makes us look as if we graduated in 1942."
–Zhou.

Eric brought this picture of us out to field camp with him. Still remember the message he sent to us before he left, was going down the escalator on the left at Serangoon Station, towards the NEL.

So undeserving of such friendship & sincerity. They opened my eyes to so much. Grateful

A Celebratory Sandwich

2011-11-03T00:18:00.003+08:00

Celebratory meet up, girl-friend's done with exams! We were supposed to share dessert but after our amazing lunch, we were too full.

World talk, Italian sausage, roast beef & fresh mozzarella sandwiches at the quaint Gastromania at Serene Center, damn good conversation. Starbucks Toffee Nut Latte, co-buying a gold glitter clutch, getting Frankie from Kino. :) It's hard not to feel so blissful & blessed.

Mr Koh walked past us at Gastromania haha. So nostalgic the placeee. Love!
--

Madly in love with Sakae's Genmaicha– it's green tea infused with roasted brown rice. Its name does it no justice. Shared a box of 20 sachets with Zhou, gonna ration & see how fast I devour these 10 sachets. :)

Finished my email to Jamie, more at rest now. There's a quiet sort of processing between thinking & writing, that organizes thoughts, captures them & pours them into a more organized & rational form. By then, there are usually a couple of problems that sort themselves out.

Monday Mornings.

2011-10-31T11:23:00.000+08:00

This short film is absolutely worth your 12-minutes.

Stumbled across this when a churchie re-posted it, always nostalgic to see childhood friends grow up, but I already voted for Caline. (I always secretly hope, the couple singing the duet, fall in love with each other in real life)

O.P.I & Thai food, with Gloria!

2011-10-29T11:59:00.001+08:00

The one thing you must know about Gloria, is that she's completely unpredictable. Like say, if we set a date to bake, I'd expect that we're probably not gonna bake, & there will be a fresh idea on that day. Like say go buy O.P.I at a flea at cathay? Lol, spent like 50 bucks :/ But the colors were pretty & it was so much cheaper since the stock was from the warehouse.

Went to Nakhom for lunch, at around 3pm, the quietest I've EVER seen Nakhon. Peaceful lunch, the girl managed to finish all her tomyam soup, crazy. Even with 5 guys, we can't even finish the same bowl of tomyam soup, too spicy. Caught up on stuff, laughed at her sudden urge to dig up her garden & plant new plants??? Like seriously, I don't think you can ever find a girl now, that will dig up the garden just before she has a dinner at Orchard Hotel to attend? & manage to shower, change, put on her make-up etc & get out of the house in less than an hour, power. Good time spent with her!

Calls from Queensland. Not sure what to make of things. Just then, someone called to check on things. Asked me out for supper, was initially too lazy to go. "I'm cabbing down now, come and meet me, talk to me, I'd be downstairs in 10minutes". A whole lot better after talking & apple pie. So thankful for friends.
--

"I must learn to love the fool in me--the one who feels too much, talks too much, takes too many chances, wins sometimes and loses often, lacks self-control, loves and hates, hurts and gets hurt, promises and breaks promises, laughs and cries. It alone protects me against that utterly self-controlled, masterful tyrant whom I also harbor and who would rob me of human aliveness, humility, and dignity but for my fool."

-- Theodore I. Rubin, MD

Limbo

2011-10-28T21:39:00.002+08:00

"INFJs have uncanny insight into people and situations. They get "feelings" about things and intuitively understand them. They know things intuitively, without being able to pinpoint why, and without detailed knowledge of the subject at hand. They are usually right, and they usually know it. Consequently, INFJs put a tremendous amount of faith into their instincts and intuitions.

They are very sensitive to conflict, and cannot tolerate it very well. Situations which are charged with conflict may drive the normally peaceful INFJ into a state of agitation or charged anger. They may tend to internalize conflict into their bodies, and experience health problems when under a lot of stress.

They are perfectionists, constantly striving to achieve the Perfect Relationship. This can sometimes be frustrating to their mates, who may feel put upon by the INFJs demanding perfectionism. However, it may also be greatly appreciated, because it indicates a sincere commitment to the relationship, and a depth of caring which is not usually present in other types. "

"The INTP has no understanding or value for decisions made on the basis of personal subjectivity or feelings. They strive constantly to achieve logical conclusions to problems, and don't understand the importance or relevance of applying subjective emotional considerations to decisions. For this reason, INTPs are usually not in-tune with how people are feeling, and are not naturally well-equiped to meet the emotional needs of others.

The largest area of potential strife in an INTP's intimate relationship is their slowness in understanding and meeting their partner's emotional needs. The INTP may be extremely dedicated to the relationship, and deeply in love with their partner, but may have no understanding of their mate's emotional life, and may not express their own feelings often or well. When the INTP does express themselves, it's likely to be in their own way at their own time, rather than in response to their partner's needs. If this is an issue which has caused serious problems in a relationship, the INTP should work on becoming more aware of their partner's feelings, and their partner should work on not requiring explicit positive affirmation to feel loved by the INTP. "

Tough stuff

Cheesecake Nuances

2011-10-27T22:26:00.000+08:00

Oh right, a few things on my mind:

To watch "Eternal Sunshine Of The Spotless Mind"
To watch "One day"–
(As Glow made me reluctantly promise to.)
To get a Brixton hat–
(Not quite sure how I look, plus it's very unpractical, but I sincerely want one.)
To make spiced cider woopie pies
To hand-write letters to a few people
Read more articles from The New York Times
(A lot more insightful than the local papers, when they're writing about sociology & culture.)
To buy Frankie (magazine)
(& try to not wince at the price)
Confirm time with Gloria about lunch!
(Amused at how I've been to Nakhom like at least 6 times within the last month. It's the killer oatmeal prawns man.)
To try and decide on the size & print LRP Fundraiser tickets?
To get or not to get– Tom Ford's Violet Blonde, 50ml Eau De Parfum
Sounds divine.
To cook dinner!
(As it usually is, when I'm on a school break. Sister loves it, esp since she's having her o's; & that's more than enough reason to cook every single day)

--

That's what friends/ bros are for: Through the regimentation, he somehow manages to pick up the phone when I need to rant, managing to text me in the morning before pt, call me in the afternoon to check on me, call again in the evening to make sure everything's ok.

Wanted to go down for the SWF (Singapore Writer's Festival) Publishing Symposium. A pity I've been so caught up with situations, & by the time I remembered, it was a day too late. Next year, I shall make a date with tamz & ash. Hoping also to participate in the 'Literary Meals' segment! Such an intriguing concept to have a meal together with 10-25 or so others (you do not know), along with a gifted author, sharing & discussing writing styles and nuances. Echoes from Kinfolk Mag, the sacredness of small heartfelt gatherings :)

&& yes, I shall yield to my carnal cravings for Cheesecake. Good cheesecake, I hear you calling.

Creative anguish & genius

2011-10-27T00:22:00.002+08:00

Creatives, maybe we're tad over emotional & long-suffering, but. God works through us, even the pagans realize an entity with all the characteristics of God, just without getting to know Him, or identifying Him.

Tell Her- Jesse Mc Cartney

2011-10-26T20:33:00.000+08:00

Mel's 20th!

2011-10-24T11:22:00.002+08:00

Dinner at Nakhom (again!) haha. The best thai food in the area. Without doubt

Being very sneaky, getting Mel to drop us off at different places. Before all heading back to Sengkang to get the cake!

Ernest's expression, epic.

All listless because the wallaby (the gent) is overseas.

Because even when he's not around, the gent will still defend me.

Wallaby oh wallaby, when will you be back?

Bros.

--

Jacq: (Grins) Why so bling bling today?

Sparkle makes me happy

Without hands

2011-10-24T10:39:00.001+08:00

I need to learn how to ride a bike without hands!

"Golden Tree" by Martin Brooks from Ninian Doff on Vimeo.

No place I'd rather be.

2011-10-23T23:18:00.001+08:00

No place I'd rather be, than here in Your love.

Anew

2011-10-21T15:30:00.000+08:00

Eventually got down to spring cleaning this virtual space. No idea where my links went though. Oh well, the old has to go. Thoroughly embarrassed by the style of writing (or lack there of), from year's ago. Adolescent rants about nothing important at all. Mostly in the element of raw, uncouth & kitsch expression. But, there withal, I know there was growth.

So much has been. & is becoming. There are times I feel like a computer that has reached 100% usage, and hangs there, on overdrive. There just too much going on, around. Save for trusty friends, and the fraction of kinfolk that still have a grip on life, it's getting difficult to understand the rest of humanity.

Dinner with a good old friend yesterday, we spoke about pie & people, about strength, about love; over steaming miso soup & beef. Errand running & searching for gongcha. & I was thinking, on the journey back home, about where the hell, people like her have disappeared to. She has weathered storms worse than most & yet, she hasn't given up. People like her lend their courage & strength to those around them.

Then there are those 'friends', with marigold peach jelly where their backbones should be. Those that agree that life's too hard, that we should do whatever we want, party your life to oblivion & that happiness is key. Is it really? I think it's down right creepy, even for a moment, if we believe these people should be heeded. We need a perspective overhaul, this generation.
--

As some closer folk might know, the gent's far away. Travel order for a training exercise in Queensland Australia. So I'm being more independent, not completely easy, since I've grown quite accustomed to his omniscient-sort-of presence. Been having quite some 'dates' with good old friends in the week, gleaned much from those conversations (see above).

Been shopping quite a bit too :o) Retail therapy, for a bit, just a bit. Lets examine the haul
(& convince myself to stop shopping):

4-inch brown leather stilettos, from Zara
Grey knit sweater with elbow patches, also Zara
Purple & gold bangles, French Connection (on sale on ASOS)
'The Crysalids' by John Whynham, from Kino

Terrible. Except for the book, that was a need, hands down. & a fascinating allegory about how the church in its quest for righteousness. One of the better allegories after the overused 'Animal Farm' lol.
--

Now, to shower & head out to meet Nick & the kids for dinner. Since we're going to town, might as well takeaway Garrett's for tomorrow's daylong TCM Retreat! ;)

Before Jem leaves for australia training.

2011-10-10T20:31:00.001+08:00

Well the gent's leaving in a week.

There's quite a mystery around moods + dressing. When I need to be independent, I'd pick the tights & tunic/ black dress, over a sweet pastel dress. Shorts over a skirt. Mostly only wear dresses in the weekend, or when it's time off with the girls. Shifty moods this week; though already pretty great for a Monday– snuggling in print shorts, a lazy white tank & trusty grey crochet sweater.

Getting Clementi Chee Kway takeaway, and being back in Potong Pasir within 40minutes. I adore the circle line.

Strangely packed first week of the school break–
Tuesday: Steam baths, then dinner with the poly classmates.
Wed: Work on youth camp misc publicity loose-ends, secret mission.
Thurs: Manicure, lunch with the gent, class in church at 7:30pm.
Friday: Whole day with the gent, he cleared it so we'd have more time before he leaves.
Saturday + Sunday: Packed as usual with church stuff.

Been listening to this the whole Monday. Idyllic & so relaxing
http://www.gregoryalanisakov.com/music/lyrics/150

--

Not quite sure how I should deal with a few issues.

Disgust.

Thought collective

2011-10-06T15:40:00.001+08:00

Top of my thought collective, since the last time:

Cold Storage Online Shopping.
Friends this is revolutionary. Not for me, I don't do the heavy grocery shopping that entails lugging clusters of polyurethane bags up cars/ trains/ buses, but for the poor tired housewives who do? Though, I guess we'd still feel better secured choosing fresh cuts of meat, fish, veggies, fruits. But I mean, they'd lug the cans of beer, coffee, pasta, rice, potato chips, pre-packaged stuff back for you, that's a whole load off your trolley/ shoulders already! & for $6 bucks? STEAL.
Nick, Eric, YJ's POP (army)
It didn't seem too long since they enlisted. Milestone for three good friends, but no. I cannot be there because of a prior commitment (stabs self). :( Proud of them nonetheless.
(Note to self: Make the booking for the German Buffet on Saturday/ Sunday to celebrate. )
The Gent's Birthday & Our 1st 365 Days
He's amazing. So artfully patient & thoughtful, and smart. Dreamy, in an aloof sort of way. He has a brilliant way with me, indulging my whims & fancies; knowing just when to ground me. & we like so much of the same food it's scary, except parsley (I hate parsley). From picnics, to holidays in Phuket, to curing up in his room watching 'House', laughing late into the night on the phone, deep tricky discussions about people & society, running around the car park spraying water at each other, it's been good. Very good.
Skip VS Run
A peculiar thought just came to mind: In St. Marg's Primary, we were often told to "skip" instead of tear through the corridors when it came to recess. Coincidenly I think we were pretty smart to realize then, that skipping was a lot more inefficient, albeit more graceful (but no one cared much about that, especially when the delicious chicken stew from the Chinese stall was almost sold out). I guess we picked up the 'manners, being gracious, and lady-like' bit along the way. Our teachers sincerely cared for & loved us. Those days taught us to be independent, competent, discerning & we will be ever grateful for that.
God, social relations & society.
It dawned on me, when I woke up on Wednesday, how protected/ ignorant we have been about the evils of the world. It's probably the first time I've awoken still feeling disgusted by something that I heard about, the day before. Usually sleeping it out makes a difference, this time it's to grave to ignore. There's no justifying something so revolting.

Which makes me wonder about the church. About how far we are away from meeting God's standards. If we are not real & strict with ourselves, if we cannot even be sincere in what we do on the pretext of ministry, how do we expect to guide the next generation? Ministry is not ministry just when it's labeled so. In fact, there are countless times when quiet consideration & care by a committed few, comes so much closer to the true intention of ministry, than any organizational structure or mass-message. Mere display of a greeting or formality, isn't even half as edifying as it is detrimental.

People in need are broken, are sensitive, they are plagued by the very consequences of the lies & pretense we try to reach them with. What gives? Till we can truly reconcile our heart with our actions, there is no point in ministry (or rather what we label as ministry nowadays).

Truth isn't even enough

2011-09-13T16:39:00.000+08:00

Even when truth surfaces, there is no justice.

Just wants to grab a new camera & head to Paris now.

Don't settle

2011-09-02T13:27:00.002+08:00

"I find it refreshing to meet people who aren't willing to settle, there is something very uninspiring about people who acknowledge their dissatisfaction in life and just grow accustomed to it. This is different from being content- being content is admirable and desirable.

I like being provoked to action or thought by my friends which is why I can't sustain a conversation that is premised on "doing" i.e. "what have you been doing" lately for long. I need to know what my friends think about things, know that they have an opinion on things, have things that they don't accept, have things they want to challenge."

Kinda lost

2011-09-02T13:02:00.000+08:00

I'm losing something here, but I'm not sure what it is. I need to find myself.

""When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives mean the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand. The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing and face with us the reality of our powerlessness, that is a friend who cares.""

Youth blog feature emails

2011-08-20T00:38:00.000+08:00

A few new sets of feature stories are in the pipe line for our youth blog.

http://www.happeningsaturdays.tumblr.com

Thrilled & encouraged by the response of some peers/ older ones–

Mr. R sure surprised me by being the first to reply for the guys. Completely stoked to write & help (that's a real man).

"Sure! Count me in then. Good time to start writing/typing again after a long absence from doing so. Therefore, you can be rest assured there won't be long grandma stories, unless really that "juicy" to talk about! Hahaha! Let me know the time (date/day etc) to start writing then. :D"

& Mrs. L from the YA, "I'm so honored that you included me in this! I think it's a great idea!". It's so encouraging that people care enough to do this for the youth. Feeling the love from them :)

Though there are the unmentionables who are skeptical. Oh well

--

Lunch with the bestie, super impromptu. Ended up shopping & chilling at Starbucks @Liat Towers. Great place for people watching really. Shared Garrett's caramel crisp with macadamia nuts :) Saw my Zara dress! So darn tempted.

Supper with the gent. (whistles) likes the way he looked in his tank & navy chino berms. Poor thing somehow hadn't eaten dinner even at 10pm, woofed down his burger & fries in a jiffy. Discussed the blog features with him, he gave me a new idea for another section ;) Walking back, he sings obscure songs for me, and intentionally goes off-key (he knows I hate it), a tickling war starts.

Packed day tomorrow. Time to catch winks. & hopefully all the people I emailed will magically reply by tomorrow morning. One can dream right?

To write in glitter

2011-08-18T17:05:00.000+08:00

Todaysmeet.com sparked off this whole writing revival. Intense philosophical debates. Led to being singled out to be a copywriter for collab projects. Asked to proof-read collab projects. My choice not to join the copy-writing team for grad-show, was met with shocked faces & "But why??????".
Somehow don't think this 'writer' label will vanish, anytime soon.

It does scare me. My writing is a far cry from what it used to be. Blissfully awkward, choppy. The last thing I wanted was for people to notice. It's easy to be bombastic, but that's not good writing at all. A written piece that makes you feel, draws you to dream, that's what I've lost. On the path, searching for everything. Again
--

Got a small sum today, friend cleared debts. Blew it on all the small ebay + etsy stuff I've been curating. Alright, it's just the impulsiveness pain brings (cramps). Nevertheless ebay.com is amazing friends, $30 (inclusive of shipping) for Benetint, which is retailing in Sephora for $65.

Which reminds me of my latest nail polish muse– Deborah Lippmann. Shade: 'Boom Boom Pow'– a glamorous, glitter-infused lacquer containing real 24k gold dust. Shade: 'Happy Birthday'– a rainbow colored glitter lacquer, perfect cheer-me-up! Retailing on ebay for SGD24 & 28 respectively. Resisting temptation for now. Darn pretty though

Gonna meet the gent for dinner! Springy noodles & abalone galore ;)

LRF Dinner fundraiser flyer done!

2011-08-17T21:18:00.000+08:00

Stumbled across a Singaporean Letterpress Printing company today. Gosh do you know how long I've been looking for one?! This is a special day, I can feel it in the air!

Haven't done anything face-palm bimbotic despite having pink/gold nails. A good sign! (smiles) Vaguely remember Dorries squealing in the middle of class, when she noticed my nails. Gave me such a shock lol. Thank God, school work's not so heavy this week!

Can't decide between the peacock & graphite Longchamp Le Pliage, ughh. Leaning toward the graphite I think. I think, or like black? AHHHHHH.

(edit)
Suddenly having cramps. So fast, 28days over? :( Gonna wrap myself up in the OSIM umama thingy!

Miraculously managed to finish the LRF Dinner Fundraiser flyer despite the cramps. Miraculous, because I'm usually pretty useless when my womb is killing me. Totally grumpy, irritable, lazy, immobile. Yeah, but not today. Quite productive I must say hehe. It still hurts though, for the record.

zara bird print dress :(

2011-08-16T21:58:00.000+08:00

In an unexplainable bout of interest: read the whole history of the Taj Mahal in one sitting, such a tragic story, painfully beautiful place (makes mental note to visit it one day). Love stories seem to have more depth when pain is involved. Not being angsty, but there's always pain in love; truth. (The gent & I are very happy though, thanks)

This bird print Zara dress (that costs 79.00 sgd) is playing with my mind. Mesmerized by the print, apprehensive because of the price-tag. For a Zara dress, it's actually pretty inexpensive, but still. Knew I shouldn't have walked into the store. Such is the life when you're in university vs those who've started working :(

Which reminds me, projects on hand:

'Strangers', school assignment by Chris
'Lease Renewal Fundraiser', for church
'TNT Reloaded', youth camp publicity
'Dance Banner', by Deniece

--

Still craving for TWG's macaroons, tapping feet till the 27th date!

Steamy Bakuteh

2011-08-15T22:31:00.000+08:00

Steamy Bakuteh on rainy monday nights.
With the gent (it always gets good when he's out on a weekday)
On a lame-streak, "You know, I sneeze into tissues when I'm happy".
I know right, crazy. Crazy good together
Solemnly decalres "I've got a big surprise for you"
Whips out a water spray,
a water fight ensues in the carpark,
I get hold of the spray.
He runs away, screaming.
Collapse into the car, our sides still in stitches.

Mornings

2011-08-15T12:20:00.000+08:00

(sheepish smile)

Too much of a dreamer sometimes. Constantly on my mind: Clouds, rose macaroons (& other food) & holidays. Rainy morning, strangely glad for the bout of morning nausea.

Canon AE1-Program

2011-03-07T18:10:00.000+08:00

& there is nothing like a new film camera. Plus knowing that you saved 100 bucks on it, sweet. This baby has an incredibly viewfinder– "It has one of the largest, clearest and brightest finders ever made. Its finder is bigger than the finder of the Canon 5D Mark II, and much bigger and brighter than the finder of the Nikon D3X." How's that for a £70 worth of camera + 50mm f1.8+ shipping. Rearing to load up, shoot & make piles of bokeh and grainy goodness.
--

After fyp, there's a lot to consider, all the applications for uni & everything. Then there's the dreaded external examination thingy. It's like re-run of final presentation zzz. New arrangements for youth, publicity for church camp, youth room matters. Craving for thick soup & more popeyes fish + mash potatoes (glorious stuff really).

pause

2011-02-09T21:59:00.000+08:00

Pause.

Back! Wanted to jot down some happy thoughts whilst in this mess of fyp. A few things that never fail to cheer me up:

Comfort foods– To name a few: Creme Brulee Chocolate by Cadbury, Royce White Chocolate, Mac&Cheese from Kenny Rogers, Clam Chowder from The Soup Spoon, Sour Cream & Onion Pretzel from Auntie Anne's, Lotus Root Soup from Soup Broth Asia, Fried Marsbars & Fish n' Chips from Chippy's, Caramel Frap or Mochiatto from Starbucks (only Starbucks, Coffeebean will not suffice), pure vannila from Coffeebean, Belgian Waffles from The Marketplace, Broccoli Cheese Soup from Quiznos, Smoked Salmon, Seared Cod, Eggs Benedict & Lasagna from P.S Cafe.
Talking to Jem– especially when he's ridiculously funny & serious at the same time. Alas, he's in some jungle somewhere outfield. What I loathe the most about him being in the army– are these long stretches away, completely not contactable. I wish we could speak in thought shapes, like in the Crysalids adhjakdh.
Retail Therapy– New clothes? Uhh, I think this really goes for every girl? Been stashing away quite a few items in my shopping cart from ASOS, Photojojo & Fredflare. ASOS: This grey maxi dress (here), this pair of sunglasses (here), this print cardigan (here). Photojojo: This chalkboard speech bubble (here) & this bokeh filter (super dreamy, here). Fredflare: Mini Robo Vaccum (here), Happy Birthday Nail Polish (here), A Mini Foosball Table (this I will get one day, here). I mean at least I haven't check any of that stuff out right? Just lookingggg, and dreaming.

And, for the actual buying. I got a grey sequined cardigan & a blue print top from F21. I didn't buy anything till the last store, dot can vouch for that! :D
Rings– I've got this thing for rings, pretty darn particular about them, they have to be the right color, height etc... And I wonder how many guys actually know that in the process of getting engaged and married, you have three important rings to buy, not just one :p

1) Engagement Ring: This is the ring you propose with. It's usually not a diamond, a precious stone nevertheless, and it's kind of like a prelude to the actual diamond, very romantic, dreamy and girly. Less than a thousand would be a good estimate. (Totally eying: This topaz here or this girly cobalto calcite here)

2) The Diamond Ring: There's no running away from this one guys, girls far and wide know their stuff about this one, cut/ clarity/ color and all that jazz. That is why you choose this ring with her after you have proposed, then you don't goof this one up, it is so key to actually get a ring she likes. Depending on your budget this can go from a few thousand to a few tens of thousands, it really depends on your budget (but you know practically, you wouldn't want like 30k on your finger now would you? Dangerous)

3) Wedding Band: Well after the wedding, you don't expect your wife to walk around with a few thousand dollars on her finger every single day right? The wedding band is for normal daily wear, and it tells the other guys "Sorry, don't bother to try!". Wedding bands typically cost less than 500. (I have been bent on this band ever since I first set eyes on it 4 years ago: here). So pretty.

& Technically the groom only gets one ring: the wedding band lol.
Meeting my homies– Gonna meet ashley on friday :) Hopefully the others will be free to chill & everything. Nothing ever goes terribly wrong if they're around. Friendship like this, few have.

--

Fyp has been a pain though. & seriously, I am not paying a few hundred dollars to print a book ok. Talk about wasting resources, this is not a necessity! Oh come on, be practical, if cost price is that high, who on earth pays to print commercially like that?! I think I've got my priorities straight thank you. I cannot spend frivolously like this on a book that advocates social causes, it's too obvious a juxtaposition, hypocrisy.

I think I'm gonna ask around for opinions and quotes from normal people, everyone has a part to play. It's called a social effort for a reason.
--

On top of that there are a few other things to note: Video for Church Camp Publicity, teaching DT, preparing projects for uni submission...

Back to work folksss.

MPO Children's Camp 2011 Tee design

2011-01-13T03:38:00.000+08:00

My master plan for world domination! Muahahahaha, ok no no, it's just the awesomeness you get to wear if you help out with the Myanmar orphanage mission trip this March :D

I'm still deciding if I should go.

2011

2011-01-10T15:15:00.001+08:00

2011

Bear with me, rawr, paws in the air. So much to say about the last few weeks. No idea where to start. Everything's still in quite a mess in my brain. I mean, things have been swell for the most part, all the festive love. But fyp just kills it, there's constantly this nagging fear of work not done at the back of my head. Didn't quite enjoy the holiday as much as I would have liked to.

Celebrations were an eye-opener. It's only this round, that I realized how distinctly diverse my groups of friends are. It's a total switch in conversational topics, styles, maturity, ideology & mannerisms every single time. Brain got fried adjusting & re-adjusting throughout the holidays, quite dizzy, still. But I thank God for every single one of them. It's different perspectives all round, trains versatility that way.

One group that really made me think again this season, was my poly classmates. To be honest, when I first started school I was ready to just make hi-bye friends, I mean I already had my other friends outside. I didn't expect much from them, but they kicked that perspective out pretty quickly. I've never seem a more sincere bunch, people I actually have so much faith in. People that live with such vibrancy, and energy, yet down to earth & real, and I tell you I learned so much about true friendship in the most unexpected place. Maybe it's the similar way our brains work.

God is. I don't know why we try and explain God sometimes.
--

Beautiful things–

A guy's notes to his future wife, hilarious but completely sweet. (here)

Panoramic photo from the Horizon Perfekt (here). Is it wrong to really really want this camera?

Perfect beach pictures (here)

If I ever can afford it, I will pack my wardrobe with clothes from Anthropologie & conveniently take this set of new bedding too (here)

--

Happy stuff. Pictures kopped from dot's, who kopped them from weheartit/ tumblr. A guy friend once told me, that if you like a girl you will make her happy. The things that make a girl happy aren't that difficult to figure out right?

Ok I need a new book. Do you know that brown isn't my favourite color anymore?
--

Parents suddenly got MIO TV for no apparent reason. ESPN anyone?

Off to quiznos at Raffles Place to visit the working bestfriend & drown sorrows in broccoli cheese soup.

Christmas 2010

2010-12-27T17:02:00.003+08:00

With Christmas Trees & Love.

A bright, sunny, windy, rainy day! Completely unexpected weekend. A ton of great stuff happened (like getting a brown Campo Marzio fountain pen for Christmas!), gathering with the girls + their boys, making lasagna for everyone with Jem (or rather, sitting on the counter top chatting, while he slices onions. Occasionally feeding him doritos? muahaha), homely family gatherings with mickey mouse hats.

Chef Dinosaur

Lasagna & salad

Then there's always the 'Oh-gosh,-this-is-so-ridiculous-I-cannot-believe-it-is-actually-happening' moments. Sure gives 'absurd' a new meaning. Oh well, word to the wise– "The jealous are troublesome to others, but a torment to themselves." William Penn. I'd take some trouble than torment any day. World peace.
--

"Thank God for Christmas, for if Christ wasn't born we wouldn't be saved by grace"
– Tammy

PICNIC, P.S cafe, sparkly nails

2010-12-20T23:49:00.001+08:00

Watching clouds

Met Jem for a sort of picnic today. We met in the late morning, walked into cluny, played an indie-acoustic mix of music from my portable speakers, while lying down on the grass beside the lake. Closed our eyes, murmured, laughed, talked, watched the clouds. I think we did that for an hour or two, before walking to the tanglin gate & heading down to town. Went with him to shop for gifts for his parents, met his friends, who introduced him as '2nd Lieutenant Jeremy Pan' to their girlfriends, which was awkward but it sure sounded good muahaha. Film roll sent for developing!

Christmas unleashed my inner shopaholic. Been more liberal with cash-on-hand. Got the Topshop Card today, self-explanatory (all the fault of a sheer throw over). Met the girls in the late afternoon for corporate manicures, hehe. Painted my nails a certain shade from the new OPI Holiday 2010 Burlesque Collection. It's so mesmerizing I get distracted by my nails while replying messages (bimbotic moment) lol. Sam & dot too. Tamz & Ash got shimmery deep browns in stark contrast lol. So girly & festive. Completely feel the festive joy radiating from my nails zzz.

Look at the mountain of lasagna seriously

Haha, glow looks darn cute here, like some elf

THE TOMS CLAN

Glow had lasagna too

Atas a bit

The slowly appearing dot lol

Awesome doorstopper cake

This year, Christmas is such a hurricane of events, I don't quite know where to start. Caroling with the bb boys & our youth was an experience in itself. I've never wanted to laugh so much whilst singing. Chill out at P.S Cafe @ Ann Siang Hill with the best folks ever, lasagna & gooey chocolate cake. Absolutely intriguing time talking about people, debating about attitudes & what can be done. All very sharp people, substantial conversations, with action-plans (that's the best part, no point talking so much without doing something about it).

besides work

2010-12-14T22:28:00.000+08:00

Besides work

It's impossible to wake up cranky when the first things you see when you get up is "Good Morning Sus!" from Jem & glow lol. Been getting really random messages all morning, first it was glow who accidentally miss called me when he woke up, so he texted to say it was nothing & 'Good Morning'. Then my cousin– asking if I had a fishing rod? I mean, do I look like I have a fishing rod or the time to go fishing? Lol, I don't mind going out in a fishing boat for leisure fishing, but I honestly do not know how to fish. Needless to say, his message sent me rollicking into laughter. I want to dive though. Guess it's close enough for the mix-up. Afterward, Melvin sent me a very rhetorical statement about youth work. Much to think about this morning aye.
--

Been doing a bit more research on brands that give back to society. &Well I reckon, this Kate Spade bangle is currently rising high up on my wishlist this year. Giving back to the society whilst getting a darn pretty & smart piece of art that you can wear on your arm? I'm sold. Also, did you know that for every pair of TOMS you buy, they give a pair of TOMS to the needy African children? Sooo much more reason to get a pair of those neat walking shoes. Ughh, retail therapy, you will be my downfall, even if it is for a good cause.
--

Crit 2 tomorrow zzz. I hate crit. No matter how prepared I am, I always feel unprepared. Plus this wisdom tooth thing is killing me.

Jesus be the center. Be my source, be my guide Jesus.

Luke & Francesca's Wedding

2010-12-12T23:50:00.003+08:00

Weddings. I love weddings. Celebrating love always puts everyone in a lovey-dovey mood. Attended Jem's cousin's wedding dinner at Intercontinental on friday. Was pleasantly surprised to see vincent there lol small world. He happened to be friends with Luke in army or something. Musicians are naturally romantic, I think. The wedding was one of the craziest I've been to. The completely fun-loving couple made all the difference. Spunk is good.

OOH. 'Love In A Cab' is out. Working on that short film was part of my internship. The shoots until 2am? Meeting the monster of an ultra bounce. Dinner in 10minutes before we dive back to work again. Longfei squatting in the front seat of the cab with 3 florescent lights somehow fitted in the cab & out of frame, and him getting a cramp subsequently, but refusing to get out until he got the perfect take of that scene. Amazing to see everything come together on screen now. So romantic. Completely love yao guang/ chinian's short films. Plus they're a really great bunch of people to work with. I want to watch '18grams', Charms said it was very famous & everything started from there.

the greater good

2010-12-12T23:50:00.000+08:00

the greater good.

Sometimes it's tough to figure out what on earth the right thing is. Situations can get so complex within a short span of time, volatile, unstable. People are beautiful creatures, yet it's that same beauty in complexity that tangles unsuspecting emotions & intentions.

Layers. I've realized that one single person, can be many different people at different layers of intimacy. She can look aloof & cold on the surface; you catch her musing when she thinks no one's looking; dig deeper and she seems kind of afraid; sow more time & you see her walls, strengths, apprehension; it's only a few layers of time, and it seems like a whole new person I'm looking at. Kind of like those everlasting gobstoppers.

Then again how far can we micro-manage each relationship to that extent of knowing/ reality?

Is it practical? When there are five people maybe. But when there are more, mirco-managing will be your down fall. Yet it is so vital that each person feels understood, and heard, cared about. Where do you stop caring? What about the greater good of the community, where does that stand when one person's needs cry out? How do you measure? An inch of want, a bucket of desperation?

rosti & latte

2010-12-05T23:05:00.000+08:00

Over Rostï & Latté

because there's nothing like us.

Got 'Water For Elephants'! (the new cover(right) looks more shallow than the old cover(below) hor?) & The Border's Privilege Card, & a new bottle; all from Borders yesterday! Ebullience rising. Jem got his millionaire book! It is one of the things I enjoy the most– shopping there with Jem, flipping through the fresh cut pages together, picking out interesting covers, laughing at ridiculous titles. Shared the Borders card, because at the rate that we buy books & read I'm completely sure we're giving Borders a run for their 20bucks.

It makes me smile in my kidney that we both are readers. I think it's immeasurably important to read, to yearn knowledge, there is so much wisdom to gain. & There's just something very evocative about someone with a good book in hand.

--

"Personally I have so many, perhaps too many big plans for the radio station, but as someone wise said: Aim for the sky, kenna the tree. Aim for the tree, kenna the ground. So I'll aim for the heavens, and we'll pluck off a piece of cloud from the sky and eat it like cotton candeh babeh"
– Tammy

My exact sentiments, but for other issues of course. We're so different, the seven of us, but in the deeper things, it's uncanny how alike we think.

I appreciate Jem a lot. Few can successfully maneuver through my mind-boggling questions/ moods & successfully put me at ease, when I'm having cramps. I know I can get more abstract (in thinking), & be very unpredictable & erupt into irrational goo when my abdomen hurts.
--

So tired, so tired.
--

For there I find You waiting
And there I find release
So with all of my heart I'd worship
And unto You will I sing

For You alone deserve all glory

Christmas list 2010

2010-12-03T22:28:00.005+08:00

O, BREAK FROM WORK. BRAIN DEAD

Christmas List! Aha, I can always make shopping lists, always

ipad (lol, I am kidding. But I'm seriously considering saving up for this)
David Choi's Albums- Only You & By My Side (haven't checked if gramophone has this!)
To watch NARNIA.
Hot Water Bottle (Red Reindeer) from Topshop
Lemon Cookies from Crabtree & Evelyn
Artisan® Series Mixer in Majestic Yellow from Kitchen Aid
Magazine Subscriptions to Frankie & National Geographic
Book: The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society, by M.Shaffer and A.Barrows
~~Book: Water For Elephants, by Sara Gruen~~
Book: Auntie Mame, by Patrick Dennis
Book: Luella's Guide To English Style, by Luella Bartley
Book: Catcher in the Rye, by J.D. Salinger
~~A new tumbler from Starbucks (my old one broke)~~ Edit: Got the 'Keep Calm & Carry On' tumbler instead
Supersampler Film Camera, available at Ruby (Pennisular Plaza)
Golden Half Film Camera, available at http://8storeytree.com/store/
Time
A puppy

Some things are just fetching. This year, I need more brain juice, starting to feel a shard stagnant. Much a mix of music, words & food, these things are a panoply really. One, without the other, falls flat. Really itching for the books, might just head down to Borders tomorrow for 'Water For Elephants'.
--

Got slightly fed up with figuring when which magazines hit the news stands. Decided to save some brain space for next year by getting down to– magazine subscriptions. Finished all the paperwork for subscriptions to Seventeen & Catalog muahaha. Don't judge me. I will get Nat Geo & Frankie as soon as I can figure out how to. Man, I hope international mag subscriptions ain't all that pricey.

Doing a lot of baseline work & organizing the editorial for fyp. One month is so not enough ughhh. Help God :( & These cramps are bothering me more than they should, again. Ugh, hurts big time.

importance of journals

2010-11-28T21:38:00.000+08:00

We spoke about the importance of journals today & so it is only apt to update this dormant semblance of a journal.

Yesterday we decided to be adventurous. Went down to the Thieves Market at Pitt Street, there wasn't much in the afternoon (note to self: next time, go in the evening). Then we headed down to Ann Siang Hill! I love Ann Siang Hill, seriously it's cozy, serene, fascinating all rolled into one. First stop: P.S Cafe @ A.S.H park. Our favourite haunt opened a new outlet there, imagine our euphoria.

P.S Cafe @ Ann Siang is nothing short of intriguing & nothing less romantic than the one @ Palais. It's the same back & white tiled floors, jazz, brit colonial vibe. Except that this is really in a colonial British sort of house & the lush greenery stares back at you when you look out the window. Completely, date-worthy! (& that's where I shall bring the guys for our annual Christmas lunch thing! so romantic awww). Plus the Lil Drum Store & Books Actually nearby? It makes for a very indie & non-mainstream afternoon.

& this is for you-know-who. I had a real good time on Saturday too :)

tie-dye queen

2010-11-23T00:58:00.000+08:00

Been on quite an unintended writing hiatus. Lets just say this 'Tie-dye Queen' as dubbed by Veron has had too much to do with fabric & has trouble adjusting out of the art-mindset, back to the designer mindset.

Dug though a whole virtual library of research to get what I need for FYP crit 1! ~~Quite~~ Extremely nerves about it though. Brain still isn't fully working. Need to develop concept & work further. Ughh, heart's still in the other project to document the Karen Tribe.
--

Weekends to clear minds. Sizzler lunch with Jem, pile on the cheese & soups at the salad bar! Discussing secondary school & such, beside the window while the rain poured outside, legit! Picnic with the girls picture perfect, all glittery with sparklers & wine. Time with the older guys well spent too, Harry Portter at Jem's before watching Harry Portter 3 in the Cinemas. Stopped at the part when everything was getting exciting zzz. Good weekend really

--

So I've been reading up about materialism in Singapore. Uhh (it's very ironic but), after grazing some fashion sites as part of the research, I also came away with a few things that I must get soon:

1) Dior Vernis in Timeless Gold (nail polish)
2) Topshop Nail Polish in Iridescent Gray
3) Topshop Hot Water Bottle, with Red Reindeer Knit cover

Ok, not that bad right. No shoes, no clothes. Nail polish is negligible, but with nails that are so prone to being chipped (especially when I play the guitar), the polish serves more to cover up than anything else. The hot water bottle is like exactly what I need for my mad cramps every month, so so timely!
--

Back to work & readings. Got to shoot tomorrow, somehow.

So not ideal

2010-11-18T21:05:00.003+08:00

When I can't see You I
know You're there
When I can't feel You I will not fear
I will trust in You and I
will not be afraid.
When the battle is close at hand
Though You're with me and help me stand
I will trust in You and I
will not be afraid.

I will not be afraid
I will not be afraid
I will trust in You
I will trust in You
I will trust in You

When the darkness is close at hand
And I'm running against the wind
I will trust in You and I
will not be afraid.
When I'm standing upon that shore
All the battles I've gone before
I will trust in You, and I
will not be afraid.

teabags, eyebags

2010-11-03T23:34:00.000+08:00

Teabags, eyebags

Just like my dear owl drawing, been dead tired. No idea why this week is so packed. Textile, youth camp + fyp is just too much to juggle. And fyp is like *&E*$(*JKASDK i don't know what to do.

Met the girls yesterday. The only break throughout the week. Drinking tea, eating cakes & chinese dumplings. Love, love, love.

Printed parts of the camp booklet today. Always underestimate the task of printing camp booklets.

Thank God for Gabriel + Elijah for Fusion camp. Thank God for Gabriel, Shaun & Melvin for T.N.T camp. All those extra muscles to cut out the edges, to fold the paper, to run for trash bags, to set up the projector, to take care of the flag-painters.

It's amazing how God always takes care of manpower for me, like they appear by themselves/ call me & tell me that they're coming down, when I (perpetually) forget to ask for help.

Got to fly away.

I need help tomorrow to cut & fold & staple! Meet at 3pm in church if there's anyone that's free to help :)

--

Strong in us, everyday.

2010-10-30T23:06:00.001+08:00

The Army Market & Marche

The best belgian waffles you can find in a coffeeshop

Marche oh marche!

Very very tempting

A boy with his meat, is a happy boy

Love smoked salmon + rosti

Very full & ready for 'House' marathon!

Spent the afternoon onwards with Jem. First stop: very boyish tactical equipment place @ Little India. 2nd stop: Lunch at Aston's @ Beach Road. We were starving by then, food took super long to come. The folks at the Cathay should teach these newbies something lol. Char-grill chicken with mushroom sauce! 3rd stop: The Army Market. He needed to get a hammock for the week ahead. We went to grab belgian waffles downstairs after that. Very very good stuff, nice thick waffles with caramelized edges, warm chocolate sauce mmmm.

4th stop: Marche for Dinner! Shared pork knuckle & smoked salmon rosti! Yes, overload of good food today :D Went over to his place after that to watch 'House' on his new tv in his room! Spending time with the baby dinosaur is always love (don't you think he looks like a baby dinosaur???).

tie-dye

2010-10-28T20:31:00.001+08:00

Tie-dying rainbows

I am pretty fond of class (even though I hate having class during fyp). Textile manipulation is quite therapeutic, I mean for now it's just dying stuff, being surrounded by psychedelic colors. Quite happy making tribal prints, I mean look at the whole hippie vibe. It's making me feel a delusional kind of happy & carefree (FYI: this is quite big because– there is no actual way of feeling carefree with fyp snapping at your heels, swimming at the back of your mind, pricking your conscience).

This is my favourite piece of work to date, for tie-dye. Veron happened to be looking when I peeled open the semi-dry piece, & she started pranced around singing "Oh it's so beautiful, so beautiful! Put it on the board!" I really wanted to laugh (it was so awkward to see her do that), but I managed a slight smile instead. The print feels so tribal. I like

Doing motif development for textile class early. Still deliberating if I should apply for LOA (leave of absence, which means you can officially skip class) for camp, I mean people only apply for LOA if they are very certain that it'd be approved. Not that certain of reading Veron's mind.

I wish with all my heart that Singapore would import dinosaur chicken nuggets & that Jem would be miraculously out of camp to eat the nuggets with me. I'm sure we will end up having a full-fledge dinosaur chicken nugget battle before eating anything ;)

--

So so so tired. This is ridiculous, I mean it's the first week. Adjust quickly sus, you need to be on your toessssss, yawn. SIP presentation tomorrow, I hate presentation. Such a waste of time, especially this sort. Tomorrow's a long long day. Looking forward to worship night though :)

Chinese Christian songs somehow sound effortlessly more sincere.

--

You are my strong tower
Shelter over me
Beautiful and mighty
Everlasting King

You are my strong tower
Fortress when I'm weak
Your name is true & holy
And Your face is all I seek

comfort ramen & leading prayer encounter

2010-10-25T22:16:00.000+08:00

Comfort food & encouragement

The last few days have been a mad telematch of situations. Super tired. Thank God, there was no class on monday. Completely enjoyed the weekend, Friday: Ramen at Ajisen for supper + cuddles, never enjoyed comfort food so much. Saturday: Surprise sunflower bouquet, dinner at Lerk Thai, soft shell crab pad thai & catch-up time at the esplanade roof top garden, dreaming about watching a musical together. Sunday: Breakfast at macs, buttery pancakes love. Man, we sure do spend a lot of time eating together lol.

Prayer Encounter with the youth encouraged me much. I remember where I learned the whole encouragement thing from– Yahui, when we were in cf. She used to tell as about Barnabas & remind us how important it was to be united etc. Nostalgic & it was so edifying those days, just as it is now.
--

Met dot to go out today. Towning on Monday afternoon. Sure beats the Monday blues lol.

Back to school tomorrow! Can't wait to see classmates my classmateys. Gonna be quite an exciting sem with fyp. I mean fyp is like your dream project, do absolutely anything you want! That has to be good right? lol

Totally miss the army boy already. His boyish grin, silly antics & all the loving that he is.
--

Much of a bummer that I've seemed to have lost my bunch of keys, found out when I wanted to pay for something online. Not really fretting because I've recently detached by house keys from the bunch & placed them in my wallet. What irks me is that my IB device is with that bunch of stuff & if I don't find it by tomorrow. I need to report lost etc, such a hassle. Last I remember using something from that bunch of keys, was when I opened the youth cupboard on sunday... Gonna check tomorrow!

Been on quite a music shortage recently. Thinking of getting cds. Kari Jobe? More Jack Johnson?

--

A raging tempest only you can still
My heart is thirsty Lord
To know You as I've known
Drink from the river that flows before you throne

barefooted

2010-10-19T16:45:00.001+08:00

Barefooted

I hate wearing shoes, like any kind (sandals suffice when I go out). If you make me stay somewhere even outside, long enough, you'd probably find me barefooted. I like to feel close to the ground, there's nothing like being barefooted really. Reminds me of home, always

So I'm still on holiday. And cooking up a storm at home like my daddy would say, storm because it sometimes looks like a hurricane just came through, with a whole lot of stuff in the sink waiting to be washed. Sera "OMG I love it when you're on holiday, it's like party food every day." No idea if that's a good thing or not. But the beef stew needs to cook for 3 more hours so here I am.

Ironically, my 'food inspiration & recipes' tabs are opening directly beside my 'fashion & online stores' tabs. Sometimes I close tabs from the fashion side– "No I shall not buy this dress, nor this pair of sandals..." next tab: 'The World's Best Lasagna', "OOH, I think I shall make lasagna for lunch". No I completely do not feel guilty by the juxtaposition.

Reading more. Doing a bit of research & getting an idea about what I want to do for fyp. Super tempted to get 'Water for Elephants' by Sara Gruen after reading Siyi's blog. Need some good books to read, brain getting a bit dusty. Finishing up last bit of report, scanning pictures. That reminds me, got to pass Karen books + thesis to Liwei.

Ah Cat Power, Sea Of Love playing. So :)))), totally love the holidays.

Ok bye, gonna start on the salted egg yolk sauce.

--

So charmingg

salted egg crab + eat pray love

2010-10-16T23:12:00.000+08:00

Salted Egg Crab + 'Eat, Pray, Love'

Meeting in the morning with the 3 Amigos & Ps G. Planning for 2011, super egg-citing year ahead :) Jem came, and we met his good friend from poly: Alvin (the chipmunk, ok kidding), at cafe somewhere at parco for lunch. After the talk about army + inventing. It came to the usual dying questions his friends have for me "SOOO susanna, how did he ask?", "What do you see in him?", "How did you know him?". Then when they manage to catch me alone they always tell me: "Take care of him ok, he's a really good guy". Always makes me smile, because they are right as can be.

Went to catch 'Eat, Pray, Love' after Alvin left! Picturesque architecture, beautiful mountains, grasslands and all. Food that makes you hungry even after eating lunch. It's for those with unquenchable wanderlust. & It's Julia Roberts, how can anyone not love Julia Roberts right?

Dinner was what we were totally waiting for. Our favourite creamy salted egg crab! Its like the best kind of crab to eat. Just that & Man Tou and I was in heaven. Making silly faces at each other that mean 'this crab is very very good', because we were too busy eating to talk :p Then close to the end, the crab decided to steal a chip of Jem's tooth, which did not stop him from finishing the crab lol. Needless to say, I absolutely love spending this kind of time with him :)

coro & sogurt

2010-10-14T23:57:00.000+08:00

Coro & Sogurt!

this is why we cannot be taken lightly

Center-parting

Mustache touche

Gangsta

I love dot :p

The light was gonna fall you see

We are actually very normal, really :)

LOVE YOU GIRLS

blown

2010-10-12T18:40:00.000+08:00

Blown

"She's whimsical. Free-spirited, calm, gentle, so full of goodness, love & sincerity; you cannot help but love her."

(sarah you made my day)

--

Was talking to Jamie on msn today. Walao, I miss her. It's so freaking weird to not see her when I meet 7! Like the other time, I counted 7 seats for the girls and I was like eh where's Jamie? Before I realized, shit Jamie's not here. So many things have transpired. It feels like at least 3 months or so since she's been gone, when she has been only gone for a month+. You better come back in June Neo Jie Min. There's chilli crab, prata & xlb waiting for you :(

--

So unexpected! I was on my way back from the studio (had to go back to get Mun to sign some stuff) in the mrt station when someone hollered– "SUS!!!" from somewhere in front of me. You see it was kind of crowded, and I didn't recognize the voice. So I closed my book & gingerly continued moving forward, scanning the crowd for owner of the voice... when someone tapped me on the shoulder. I whipped around to see Chris's highly amused baby face, and proceeded to take a swat at him for making me jump.

Haven't spoken much with that fella since I left the short stint at old folks center, so the impromptu "Eh you free? Lets go somewhere & talk man" from him was quite refreshing. Cake at secret recipe! :) Love talking to people about life, especially those with similar interests etc.
--

I suddenly really feel like eating garlic bread from pizza hut.

Kind of feel like shopping, like really shopping. I want the peach embellished maxi from F21& the sandals from c&k. Can't can't can't sus! The-30-days-of-Jem's-21st-Birthday fund is priority.

--

I wish that I could step away and breathe
This world’s trying to swallow me
Clear away the clouds inside my head

Someone just tell me
That it’s ok now
What are you worried about

Got my dreams, got my life, got my love
Got my friends got the sunshine above
Why am I making this hard on myself
When there’s so many beautiful reasons I have to be happy

baking apples

2010-10-11T21:54:00.000+08:00

Baking apples & photographs

Woke up feeling very much like a, for lack of a better parallel– watering can. Quite an irrational sudden gush of inadequacy and this sickening feeling that things could be better than they are now. Like hollow, and poured out. Set out to make myself happier after wallowing for the better part of the morning.

Made apple cobbler/crisp! It's this baked apple + lots of apple crumble bits + cinnamon sugar thingy (which is awesome with vanilla ice-cream or by itself). Which is gone already. Walao, I made a full tray of it. Mommy says it's probably the most successful way to make the family eat 3 apples each within a day lol. & baking apples smell mellow & glorious. Made me feel much much better
--

I realized something very ironic today. Even through Jem is an aspiring Natgeo photographer, and I'm a photography major– we never take pictures when we're out alone. We prefer to enjoy the moment to its fullest. No pictures of the (Disney like) sparkling Hotel Capella balcony overlooking the sea. No pictures of the amazing sunset at the Changi Broadwalk. No pictures of our ritualistic brunch dates at P.S cafe. No pictures of the eggs benedict he made for me. The Zirca photos disappeared too. Crap, as funny as it sounds– we need to start taking pictures more! (Ok, actually it's because there's no more eye-candy when he's away from monday-friday :p) Come on, Jem is darn good eye-candy. & Even better snuggle material! ;)
--

There's quite a lot to do. Not very satisfied with camp tee, might come out with something else. Substantially stifled by the group work involved. The mess from 'collaboration' is down right depressing. I mean, I'm sorry but it is true, in design, there can only be one designer. The rest just follow instructions & rendering accordingly. You can't make 3 people come out with 1 idea, graphically. At best you'd have 1 sort of theme/ idea, 3 different renderings. Now there's a faint idea of theme, absolutely disjointed rendering & a very unsuccessful campaign. I keep telling myself to lay off, take it slow, let things flow. Diplomatically nice, professional suicide, apparently not very ideal. Oh well, lesson learned, well.

Got to stop worrying.

lists & friends

2010-10-08T07:19:00.001+08:00

Free spirit

I have discovered 1/3 part of why I've been strangely moody the last few days. It always catches me by surprise even though I always sort of know it's coming. Woke up with cramps this morning, and then it all made sense.

On my quest to be a complete free spirit these two weeks. A few things I have in mind to do, buy, see, eat etc:

Watch 'Eat, Pray, Love'. (I want to travel like that now)
Go to Cluny Park for a picnic (miss the place completely)
Get a new pair of sandals (favourite brown ones died)
Eat at 'Food For Thought' (the new branch!)
Go to the beach
Find new music to listen to
Make apple crisp & eat it with vanilla ice cream.
Make lasagna
Send snail mail to a few people
Read a good book
Might need to get a new wallet.
Try to replace guitar output jack one last time

If I think of anything else I'd list them out again. Love lists, makes me feel organized.
--

There's just something about meeting you on a weekday. So surreal, that you're back beside me, holding my hand, bringing me out for italian food. Sometimes I cannot believe that you'd cab all the way from Jurong to town, just to spend that 1-2 hours with me, and send me home & cab back to camp. Jeremy Pan, you amaze me.

Gonna meet dot later on to go to ikea for lunch! Bestfriend outing :D I cannot say how much dot means to me, seriously. She's someone I completely trust, and rightly so after being bestfriends for more than 13 years (of course she lives a few blocks away, which is super convenient). There is zero awkwardness even if we haven't had the time to meet up in awhile, things just flow.

It's the same with 7! things just flow. And I don't know if you know what I mean, but there's just absolutely nothing to worry about when I'm with them, I don't have to look my best, or say the right things, or sit properly, or eat appropriate amounts of food at the right time? Please, we eat a lot more than people think we do, avid zhi char fans, prata at midnight. We're all so different individuals yet,

They will all wash toilets when we're on mission trip, clean up a house with 5 years worth of dust, till it's sparkling clean. Yet when they dress up, guys run into pillars. When they talk, people think twice because these are not your average dumb blonds, these are freaking pretty, smart & influential people. & at the same time we wake up to watch movies at 3am & eat durian? We laugh at countless of things, and it just all comes naturally. When something happens, these girls won't just cry with you helplessly. They go marching straight down, commanding the respect of everyone around them, tackling situations from the root. And time after time, I'm still amazed by them, adults are amazed by them, amazed by the love we have. This is as true as friendship gets. Miss you guys
--

If I have to count my blessings
Right here in my heart
Like those shining stars in heaven
Don't know where to start

You give me strength when I am weary
Hope when I am weak
You lift me on your wings of mercy
How wonderful it is

To soar into Your arms of graces
Dive into Your word of truth
Dwell into Your promises ethernal
My joy is found in You

sometimes' it's gonna pour

2010-10-06T22:06:00.001+08:00

Sometimes, it's gonna ~~rain~~ pour

Was supposed to be a really good day. 1st real day of break, meeting Jem for dinner, no more internship & crazy fashion people. Amazingly at the end of this day, I'm feeling a lot worse than after a 12-hour shoot. Things always go wrong when you're expectant.

Talking to cheeyong in the morning made me very confused & upset. I mean, I felt like I made the wrong decision. & there was stuff on the camp tee to contend with. & Jem was held back in camp, could really have used a hug from him/ just talking to him face to face. Meeting the younger ones + daniel was refreshing though. There's hardly such a chance to spend long periods of time without an agenda, with them. Reminder to self to go retail therapy, or cheer myself up somehow.
--

On a side note, I've got work coming in again for graphic. Which is a good sign, and extra cash. And does not tire me out so quickly as compared to fashion photography. What I told Mun, was probably the entire summary of what I learned from internship– "In fashion, you set a time, a date, a place & create your subject; in journalism you wait & wait for the right moment of REAL life." Good thing though is that DI work for fashion pays, and Mun says I'm pretty darn good at it now. So if there's any DI work required, he'd outsource to me yay!

Got a lot of writing to catch up on. I still want to write about how he asked. Everyone has been asking for it. Shall get down to writing that soon. Someone save me with a new lens & hard drive please :(
--

And I know there'd be days
When this life brings me pain
But if that's what it takes to praise You
Jesus bring the rain

hellooooooo

2010-10-04T22:58:00.000+08:00

Hello. It's so terribly hard to blog nowadays unless I'm sick & off work like today. (Which I'm strangely very happy about?) Yup, I think the pretentiousness of the fashion world has very much gotten on my nerves. Being stylish, does not require you to be fashionable. Fashion can be overstated and ridiculous, even ugly sometimes. Style is a different & higher league altogether, and few in the fashion world truly have style.
Well on a slightly lighter note, buckets have transpired since I last really wrote here. Some more major changes/ stuff:

Probably the most stated change– Jem & I are together. (mega huge sheepish grin)
Internship is almost ending (and I'm actually quite relived)
Jem turned 21!, is commissioned as an officer & signed-on in the army.
Jamie left for Manchester (which really sucks, I miss her)
The Auto Focus of Oliver's kit lens (Nikkor 18-135) died. (I have been rendered very handicapped by this, no pictures for so many important events this month super annoyed)
Space on my Mac has dwindled beyond believe, so I need to get a external hard-drive asap.
I am very excited to start FYP :)

Jem's Commissioning Ball

(23rd Sept)

This week, I like it that you:

1) Accompanied me when I wanted to get my nails done & you were man enough to not be squirmy about it, in fact you were totally enjoying yourself, eating chocolate & bouncing on their expensive armchairs.

2) Came all the way back to pp, even though you needed to book in. Just to spend that time with me on sunday.

3) Asked me to watch the sunset with you. Romantic much :)
--

Met ZPGY for dinner at Sushi Tei. They always make me laugh like crazy & feel a lot. I think we understand vibes in such a deep sense that, even when some stuff isn't theoretically/ logically funny, we all burst out laughing because of this common deep sensing of vibes, feelings etc. It's a designer thing yes? Missed zhou & chia today.

Super tired out. Not quite sure why. But I'm kind of glad internship is ending, I mean I enjoyed myself but I cannot imagine being stuck here forever. Too superficial.
--

Here I am waiting
Abide in me I pray
Here I am longing for You
Hide me in Your love
Bring me to my knees
May I know Jesus more and more

Come live in me
All my life
Take over
Come breathe in me
And I will rise
On eagle's wings

hug

2010-10-03T20:06:00.000+08:00

I just really needed a hug.

p.s cafe brunch

2010-09-22T23:07:00.000+08:00

Exactly the way we like it

P.S Cafe Breakfast: Eggs Benny + Bacon Sandwiches + Crushed Mint & Lime Soda (basically mojito without the rum) + English Breakfast Tea + Jazz & acoustic music; in our favourite seats by the window. Talking about the most random things, catching up, laughing. Grocery window-shopping :p I mean car shaped pasta? Giant jars of sundried tomatoes? Durain Mooncake.

– Languid mornings the exact way we love it.

I love having brunch with Jeremy Pan. Such a relaxing & reflective morning, one of those rare times we're both free on a weekday morning. Had to go off shortly after to work though. He waited with me for my train & just before I had to go, he handed me something. That made me smile and cry and smile and smile and smile, but I shall leave this story to another day (P.S still swooning)

Did the layouts for Wesley & Kristin's Wedding! The only wedding shoot I've ever seen Mun do, since he hates event/ lifestyle shoots etc. Wesley's his friend, that's why lol. We both changed and headed down to the Hermes Watch Boutique Opening @ Paragon in the evening. Quite an experience, loads of familiar faces. Flirtatious angmos.

Met aaron again. This was divine appointment really. I had no idea that he was a videographer. I had no idea that he was a Christian. I had no idea that he loves journalistic & documentary work. I had no idea that he is primarily a wedding videographer. He wanted to introduce me to his friend, apparently his friend is Alex Soh? Mun chirped in & told him to call me if he had any trips in line. "Call her if you are going to cambodia, she loves journalistic work!!" lol. & by all the questions he asked over dinner, it seems like he's sincerely very keen.

Today, this whole thing about traveling kept coming up. Through Jem, through Mun, through Aaron, through the Thai food we ate. I do so want to leave on a jet plane, see vast plains, blue-green oceans, mountains, people. Never missed traveling so much.
--

Been madly busy though. Shoot, after shoot, after DI work etc. It's tougher without LF around. Miss him & charmaine. It's good nevertheless, still learning so much every single day, even though fashion does not particularly interest me, still. HAHA

Can't wait to hear from the rest about their internship expreriences etc. Such an enriching time. Hope you guys are good. Super tired, tomorrow's gonna be very interesting :p I like seeing someone in a suit. Handsome!
--

Lord your goodness &
your love will follow me
All the days of my life
I'm surrounded with the favor of the Lord
Always and forever

sleepy & very busy

2010-09-14T22:54:00.000+08:00

Sleepy & very busy

Somehow I've managed to not reflect very much these few weeks. Completely unthinkable, yet so probable with all the stuff that's been going on. I want so much to sit beside a body of water & look into the sunset without being uneasy about the ocean loads of work waiting for me. Church + work is already taking my time up to the maximum. Still whizzing around juggling a thousand things, work has been super tiring, I don't know why we have shoots every single day. We just spend the nights doing DI work. LF has gone to malaysia to shoot a feature film for a month.

Before he left he told me "Suzie I'm going to malaysia to shoot the feature film, and I won't see you because i'd be back only after you leave, so take care of yourself & help Mun as much as you can ok? Be good!" Awwwwwwwww. Totally miss having him around already.
--

This month is a complete whirl. So many events coming up! Egg-cited for saturday :) It's already a year since cheese has been in the army. Remarkably passing us by. & we've surely grown.

--

ANYWAY, LOOK AT THIS!! :O

Woah. I hope the cheetah is ok.

--

I will reflect when I can catch my breath. Love you guys much, esp dot. Add oil & shallots, hugs

please say sorry

2010-08-22T22:11:00.000+08:00

"Love may forgive all infirmities and love still in spite of them: but Love cannot cease to will their removal."
–C.S Lewis

man's folio shoot 2

2010-08-20T21:42:00.001+08:00

People are not faces

We are having a cotton candy machine & a popcorn machine for Medical Sunday, HOW RAD IS THAT?! How rad is that? Absolutely love it. You know who's gonna be sitting beside the cotton candy machine with the kids the whole time ;)
--

Shoot for both Teenage + Men's Folio today. By the way the last shoot's pictures for Teenage with Mun's dogs are out! As dot says "WOW, that doesn't look like the usual standard at all" :p Loved that shoot the most so far, all the vintage stuff, Louis's awesome shop at Bassorah Street & the Vespa! 8am call time, actually did more DI whilst Mun shot muahaha. Good to see the team again though, the teenage team is one hell of an interesting one, trust me lol.

Wei Lun (stylist for Men's Folio) came just before lunch. With like a truckload of clothes + shoes + accessories, literally truckload. Mun sent me flying down to help him. The automobile guys downstairs, starred at the sheer amount of stuff that came out of the vehicle lol, I mean it's really a lot, even for clothes, all branded stuff at that lol. Wei Lun was very happy to see me, and got me to take care of the pile of stuff while he slowly lugged up a few luggages at a time. So while I was waiting for him one of the automobile guys suddenly ran out & earnestly said he'd help bring the stuff up for us, I think he felt bad that their car was blocking the entrance HAHA.

When Wei Lun came down he saw the automobile guy carrying this mega huge luggage, not like rolling it along but carrying it. He told me later on in the lift lol. "Wahhh, he's so nice! Why ah? I think he likes you!!" Lol, & I'm laughing at Wei Lun & not what he said lol. You see, he's the kind of guy you'd never expect to see, laughing, he has this stern & professional expression most of the time.

Ran errands after lunch onwards. Collected the USB cable from Vivo. The gels from cityhall, the blue tack, the glue, the acrylic from art friend. Picked up candy from Candy Empire too :p

We're doing a telemovie with Joanne Peh tomorrow till monday!! Call time 7am, which means I need to be up by 5am zzz. It's ok, I've stashed chocolate + gummies to survive :) Oh crap, gonna see Amin (the channel 5 sound guy) tomorrow, supposed to help bosses find out why Amin attracts so many hot girls, honestly, I don't really know why. I mean he's really nice but lol. Mun: "Do you know that all the interns that worked with us all became his girlfriend? Can you like try to like him?", Me + everyone else at the table: "Munnnnn!!!"

Keep me in prayer man, super tired!! Ok really going on a hiatus here...
--

Hide me now
Under Your wings
Cover me
Within Your mighty hand

cheeyong's visit!

2010-08-19T19:43:00.001+08:00

High Tea Buffet & Cheeyong's visit

Cheeyong dropped by today! Quite funny, the first thing he said "Have you been good?". Then he and the bosses talked about the industry, like they were old friends lol. He laughed at me writing about prata in my reflections, and had a lopsided fatherly grin when he heard that they were going out on a high tea buffet and bringing me lol. So funny to see cheeyong in 'fatherly' mode. It's usually Mathias doing all the welfare stuff lol.

Dim Sum buffet with the bosses and their friends! Their friends are so nice haha, and with his friends, Mun is really like cross between glowy & another person lol. He has glowy's talking out loud habit, and is pretty sensitive and sharp and thoughtful, he also has the other person's I-eat-a-whale-and-I-am-proud-of-it kind of candid attitude when it comes to food. If I haven't mentioned that my bosses are complete foodies, well they are, and probably the most devoted I've seen lol! Don't know how they stay fit when they eat so much!

Was quite funny, cause Ian left and then everyone was pretty much done, then these 4 Longs of XLB came. Charmain & the other girls K.O-ed already. So it was just me and the guys. One Long per person. Was just on the line of very full after finishing my share when the chinese waiter plonked another 4 Longs of XLB on our table. Everyone looked up in amazement & well shock, cause we were damn full already. Bosses jokingly said that I had to finish one more Long to pass my internship, and slowly but surely I did finish it lol. They were genuinely surprised, "Wah not bad, you can eat leh, still can finish the 2nd round of XLB". Thumbs up from the guys, lol I haven't been this full since sakae buffet with the girls.

Then I got Jamie's message– "XLB buffet at Crystal Jade with the guys on the 27th at Holland!" I was like "Nooooooooooooo!" Lol actual now I'm feeling much better, bring on a second round of XLB buffet :p But I know I am blessed la, people are eating economic rice out there on shoot, and my bosses bring me out for buffets & pay for me so I'm not complaining :)

The next 3 days are very packed & tiring shoots so they wanted to charge up today I think. Going on a hiatus till Tuesday. Keep me in prayer, quite tired, not really sure why. Must really get loads of sleep today. Calltime: 8AM tomorrow!
--

Bring me joy bring me peace
Bring the chance to be free
Bring me anything that brings You glory
And I know there'd be days
When this life brings me pain
But if that's what it takes to praise You
Jesus bring the rain

truth behind

2010-08-18T21:57:00.000+08:00

Truth behind.

"Well I think that anyone who can bring himself/herself to hurt you is either mad, stupid or jealous"
- Christopher

Lol, such an endearingly fierce & silly statement early in the morning sure makes for a smile at least. It's really good to widen my horizon, have friends from different churches. I learned so much about culture, comparing and listening to their thoughts & experiences. When I see chris, it really makes me smile because we have so much in common & this friendship is something really unique because we made friends the old-fashioned way, without any mutual connections, just plain old talking to a stranger, and within days to be able to understand each other with such depth, firmness and encouragement, it's really divine appointment. There is so much to be thankful for, these are friends for life.

"To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket- safe, dark, motionless, airless--it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable.”

-C.S Lewis.

Undeniably wrung. Yet I have a heart that's alive. Do you?
--

I barely hear You whisper through the rain–
"I'm with you"
And as your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise the God who gives
And takes away

mac&cheese cupcake day

2010-08-17T22:45:00.000+08:00

A day off begets Mac & Cheese Cupcakes

Met Dot & Glowy after they lessons for dessert! Cold cheng teng & the best of the human race, what more can I ask for right? Their ooh & ahhs from getting the mac&cheese cupcakes were icing on the cake muahaha.

Soooooo, it started from me being quite bored at Med Sunday Meeting on sunday. Well, I had no much idea about all the other stuff, was just there to handle publicity & design so I started surfing through my favourite sites on my mac. Stumbled on this recipe & it sent the teenager in me into a coma of food happiness (P.S I need to use the word teenager more often before I cannot use it anymore). Almost squealed in the middle of the meeting, managed to stop myself about 1/10 of a second before, so it came out as a weird gurgle.

Hengkah, who was sitting beside me turned to see why I made the gurgle & I motioned him to look at my screen. Was half bouncing on my seat and whispered "I found awesome!! It's mac&cheese cupcakesssss!!" He was intrigued and laughed. "I am so gonna make these" I continued, half talking to myself. "You can use my kitchen & then give us some!!" Hengkah encouraged. YJ peered at me across the table with a puzzled look on his face. Must have looked weird bouncing on my chair, talking excitedly in a whisper while the comm was talking about company logos...

So my dear neighbours in Potong Pasir have become my guinea pigs to test the 1st ever batch of Mac&Cheese cupcakes! I realized that I do have quite a lot of neighbours lol. Except glowy, but he kind of counts cause he spends half his life in pp :p Oh & I saved some for Mun & LF too. All cupcakes come in a brown paper bag with your name on the bag or on your own personalized mini-flag! Man, I forgot how much I love doing this.

Neighbour list:

1. Elaine (none for brandon cause he's in Thailand)
2. Bianca (having fever, pls pray for her!)
3. Elkan (having fever, pls pray for him!)
4. Eleanor (having fever, pls pray for her!)
5. Dot (going to have photoshoot tomorrow, so fun, shall go shopping with her soon)
6. Glow (just finished GP paper and is feeling very philosophical)
7. Liwei (seems very amused at the sudden surprise)
8. Joanne (come come! :) )
9. Hengkah (laughs to himself, because he knew about my fascination with the recipe)
10. Chari (not home yet)
11. Rena (on the way to pick joel up)
12. Ben (on the way to pick joel up)

13. Mun (probably photoshopping something)
14. LF (probably playing with Roo!)
--

An apology takes its weight from the changes that follow thereafter. Damage done, whatever else remains to be seen, proven, healed, left behind or dealt with.
--

And I'd praise you in this storm
And I will lift my hands
You are who You are
No matter where I am
Every tear I've cried
You hold in Your hands
You've never left my side
And though my heart is torn
I'd praise you in this storm

walking on

2010-08-16T20:33:00.003+08:00

Walking On

The rain decided to fall in all its glory while I was in the bus on the way to the studio. Ran across the road anyway, but it was slippery so I slowed down & got very very wet.

Mun: *Looks shocked* Are you drenched?
Me: Kind of
Mun: You didn't bring an umbrella?
Me: Forgot
Mun: Why didn't you wait for the rain to stop??
Me: I waited for 10minutes already, if i waited somemore, I'd be late
Mun: Aiyooooo, you could have just called me...
Me: Aiya it's ok la
Mun: You want to go home and change?
Me: Hahahaha, don't need la, waste time.
Mun: Really leh, you can go home and change.
Me: But I don't want to go back in the rain...
Mun: HAHA ok ok

*after asking me to show him the designs for the maps*

Mun: You sure you don't want to go home and change? As in go home, but you don't need to come back here after that you know?
Me: Huh you don't need me to do anything?
Mun: Nope, today no shoot what :)
Me: *Grins, picks up Roo who climbed on my lap* Ok

Yes, so I was on the way back from work at about half past 11am. Very thankful, cause the weekend is gonna be eaten up to shoot :( Kind of really detest missing service ughhhh. Cheeyong's coming on thursday. Man this week is very heavy on the lower half.
--

Man, I'm at a lost for words. Tell me how my little fancy-pants, I-love-soccer, I-want-to-play-starcraft-forever, I-need-to-bring-my-iphone-macbookpro-ipad-imac-everywhere godbrother suddenly transformed into a bookworm over two weeks?! Last week he bought books about soccer & zombies, this week he dragged me (not the other way around) down to borders to get Freakanomics & Sun Tze's Art Of War. Marcus Ng & Art of War leh. I'm astonished, slightly tickled and very fervently hoping that this isn't a passing fad.

Was at dhorby so we went to Trumpet Praise to see if mel was working. And he was!! Haha so fun to vist him there. I'd like to see my friends pop by at work. Especially if it was like a surprise. Talking about surprises...

First time mel asked so nicely lol.

Tomorrow's surprise-my-neighbors day. Not going to say more :) Gonna be the most well-spent day-off in a long time...
--

Covered with the fingerprints of God

talk at the benches

2010-08-15T20:54:00.002+08:00

Thank God for the bestest bestfriend who knows exactly what to say & who speaks the truth in love, who knows I need hugs (& her understanding boyfriend who drives her down, and waits for her!), for glow who knows how to call the bestfriend for help & calling afterward to check if I'm better, for someone: who made me cry, who made me so confused and annoyed, but taught me a lot (but is still probably angry with me for being so moody & not very understanding or logical).

PMS is bad. Got to work on not flaring up during these periods, totally pun intended. But it's so hard to control seriously, and by the time I realize I'm pms-ing, it's too late. By the way I think hugs from close friends are the most effective remedy for crying. Just need to be held.

Mad day. Thank you glowy for buying me soup for lunch & coming all the way back to church with it :) Everyone at the meeting was like "wahhhhh" with their eyes when I came back lol. Hengkah who was sitting beside me whispered– "Everyone is eying your soup... why you so special ah?" haha. Really appreciate you glowy, thanks!

A few other cheer-me-up-ers while I was worried about the medical sunday stuff. Sue en– "Wahhh so pretty. I like how you matched your belt and jacket and dress! Your dress is so nice, why your sandals so nice also?". YJ whispers before I leave the meeting room– "Sus, nice belt!", grin-worthy. Marcus called– "Sus are you ok?" without knowing a single thing about what happened. Telepathy! Feeling a lot better yes, thanks folks.
--

Monday is here so fast. 2nd month of internship :O wow time flies la.

Oh God, please draw near. I know that You will never forsake me.
--

When the darkness closes in Lord
Still I will say-
Blessed be the name of the Lord

You give and take away
You give and take away
My heart will choose to say
Lord blessed be Your name

tammy & louis

2010-08-12T23:05:00.000+08:00

Got the chipped lilac off my nails & replaced them with a slight coral red on my fingers & a mellow teal on my toes. Yes they match, in a quirky sort of way. Colors look very '4th of July' I'm realizing. Anyway I was off today & LF just called to say that I'm off tomorrow too, SO loving this slack week as compared to the last 3 mad weeks :p

LF: Hey Sue, you don't need to come in tomorrow, just do up the design stuff for us ok?
Me: HUH WHYYYY?
LF: Because we don't like to see you!
Me: AWWWWWWWW! :(
LF: HAHAHAHAH aww no la, it's not necessary for you to come down tomorrow. But it's not an off day ok, you are working from home on the designs!
Me: Same. LOL

Met ash & tamz for lunch at taka! Was super excited to hear tammy's story :p YES IT IS OFFICIAL: Tammy Ye is attached to Louis Han. Please jump up and down in joy/shock like we did :) So sweet & dreamy. And ________________.

Stopped by Trumpet Praise @ Dhorby to get something for someone. Guess who was working? Mel! :D So fun to see Mel there & it's so much to ask for help hence :p Was supposed to meet clement & shaun to L4D but clemmy was stuck at filming. So we went anyway, marcus wanted to come but couldn't cause of school, and thus I got very much trashed by shaun, although once he fell out of the window & died while he was looking at my screen, trying to explain something to me HAHAHAHA.

--

It's the small & simple things that garner the most bizarre responses (or lack there of). Starting to ______________.
--

I've been here grounded far too long
I'm ready to see the open wide
Ready to sing a different song
I've seen my troubles 'long the way
I want to sail towards the sun
I want to turn another page
I'm on my way

I hope i dream of clouds

2010-08-10T22:03:00.000+08:00

I hope I dream of clouds

"Suzy, has boots(the fat cat) finished eating?"
"I'd go check!"
"Ok, if she has, put Roo's bowl on the floor and let him out"

So boots was done & I placed Roo's blue bowl on the floor. Once the door was about half his size opened (which was like 7cm), a lightning bolt shot out of the door & the next thing I realized, Roo was at my feet attacking his food with vengeance. I burst out laughing. Mun (who obviously knew what would happen) came up behind me & grinned "I know right, he's crazy..."

Mun asked me to run an errand after lunch. After I was done, I could head straight back :) So after I was done, I text-ed Mun to let him know that his tripod has been passed to his friend. He replied– "Why so fast? Can't wait to go home is it??!!!!", great bosses really. Haha

My sister uses my typewriter for the first time, for her art project. "Eh Jie Jie how to make the font bigger ah?" Hehehehe (joke is that you cannot make the typeface bigger la). Trusty typewriter.

Something else that made me burst out laughing today. Went to the 'home' page on fb, and this was the first thing I saw–

Lol, awkward kind of laugh ya.

--

My threshold before I am irked that you are not replying texts– 24 hours. Don't reply mass messages? I don't too. Some times I take quite a few hours to reply questions, I reply urgent messages within 10minutes-half an hour or just call you back most of the time. It's just plain rude not to reply messages after 24hours, especially if it's something nice. Pet peeve
--

You've told me I could rise above
Like an eagle on the wind
I can glide upon Your love
But I feel the pull of gravity
And it's a weight upon my shoulders
I can't stay here any longer
I've gotta be free

National day fireworks

2010-08-09T23:07:00.001+08:00

Morning comes around & I
can't wait to see my sunny island.

Met Jem for brunch at P.S Cafe Paragon. Oh gosh, I love P.S cafe lol, I thought lunch was good when we went there the last time with the churchies; oh but breakfast/ brunch, was crazily better. We both had eggs benny (eggs benedict): perfectly poached eggs on prosciutto on a buttered bagel with the savory hollandaise sauce, goshhh. Both of us were blown away. Should have gotten Jem's expression (whilst he was eating) down with a camera lol.

The ambiance & setting of a place can really be therapeutic. NY cafe vibe, design magazines all over, awesome eggs benny, jazz & great company; all makes for a very very calming & languid morning. If only I wasn't feeling nauseous half the time. We went to look at books at ION :) & The Wright Gift Shop, which is a really quaint place! Hidden on the 2nd highest floor of ION, it has really unique stuff, very travel & design orientated. Would have bought the hot air balloon if I had a hundred bucks to spare.

Was feeling very nauseous by then, so I didn't get to meet zpgy, was sincerely upset about it because I haven't seen them in a really long time :( Oh well, but the favourite boy was very sweet and sent me all the way back. Got some rest & felt much better when it was time to meet Mun.

(from my mobile phone camera :p)

Picked up my phone when it rang–

"Hello?"
"Why you so cool, sitting up there with your sunglasses & all?"
"HAHA Where are you?!"
"My taxi just passed you, I'm gonna meet the producer first then I'd come up ok?"
"Orh ok, just let me know when you come lor... Oh wait wait mun, can you buy food? I'm damn hungry"
"Haha ok, there's chicken corn chowder, broccoli cheese soup, beef golash... "
(he names me the entire menu)
"Lol, ok chicken corn chowder & a roast beef sandwich, thanks Mun!"

One of the few people I know who will read the entire menu out to me, lol my boss somemore. Unbelievably blessed, I know :) So we were camping there eating & chilling & waiting for the fireworks.

They were indescribably beautiful. It's no use trying to explain or describe, you have to see magnificence for yourself. Standing in awe with Mun beside me snapping away, I was talking to God & our conversation went something like this–

"Look at the fireworks God, it's soooooo beautiful! Can you please have fireworks when you come back?"
"Oh I'd have fireworks that will blow your mind my dear girl, it's called glory" "Hahahahaha, I never thought of glory that way, you're awesome, love you!"

Singapore is incredibly blessed. I hope you guys had an awesome National Day too :)
--

Every tongue, every tribe
Every people, every land
Giving glory, giving honor
Giving praise unto the Lamb of God

Sakae, tammy brough Louis!

2010-08-07T23:08:00.000+08:00

Fried Tofu Day

Day out with the best people on earth + their guys! Had a good time stuffing fried tofu, salmon avocado, playing lan & eating yogurt :) Tammy brough Louis for the first time!! Really hope it was a good time for him too, go tamz! :p

When we split up to go to iluma, the girls took siyi's car & the guys cabbed down. We walking our separate ways, then stopped & turned around to see the guys walking away together. Everyone was like awwww. So glad they're friends.

Books & beef

2010-08-04T23:12:00.001+08:00

Books & beef

I secretly get very delighted when people who don't usually read good literature, start to. Jumping-around-clapping-my-hands kind of happy :) Like today when marcus went shopping with me and got 2 books form Kino :O Well ok, so I strongly encouraged him to get them hahaha but still it was like such a thrilling moment to see him get the books + read them. Well the books were about how 'Soccer Explains The World' & 'How To Survive A Zombie Attack', the former's slightly econs based, the latter is uhhh yeah, but it's a start right? haha

I bought a book too :) It's a title I've been wanting to read, for a very long time! Got a dress from F21 yay, slightly painterly & artsy, on a navy-coloured base. Marcus got like 3 shirts, 2 from Topman & 1 from Pull&bear. Please tell me who's the shopaholic here huh. Beef bowl for dinner yay, hearty :)

Went for the wake in the evening. Decidedly listened to the sermon with the perception of a non-christian to see how it sounded from that angle. I guess a lot is so subjective & so many varied conclusions can be drawn from one statement. I realized that it all depended on preconceptions, the mind just twists all other evidence towards the inclination of consciously very decided minds to justify. Sometimes we are all to clever & skeptical for our own good.
--

I want a swing.
--

"Sus you look very pretty today,
"Haha, alright la"
"With your lilac nails and all"
(smiles)
"Yes, I make it a point to notice the small things"

Guys should all learn to notice the small things.
--

When my spirit clothed immortal,
wings its flight to realms of day.
This my song thru endless ages:
Jesus led me all the way

roo+ durians

2010-08-03T23:02:00.000+08:00

Roo + durians

Monday dinner with cheeseeee who is back from Taiwan (finally)! Crystal Jade + haagen daz, shopping for a tv, eating nachos while watching inception :D Curled up on my seat from all the mind-messing scenes lol. Still totally think that Mal looks so scary sometimes. Was still deciphering the movie with cheese when we drove back lol. It's definitely one of the better films this year, though to a certain extent unsettling.

He bought me back something from Taiwan, but I think I still like the doodles on the post card + envelop the most muahaha. So endearing, I love it when people draw. Whee glad he's back :)

--

LF called me at around midnight, while we were heading back after the movie.

LF: Hello Sue, will you pass a supermarket tomorrow?
Me: Yeah I think so! Kovan lor?
LF: Eh you still outside ah?
Me: Yes (sheepishly)
LF: Wah we still down here on photoshop retouching, you outside enjoying. Tomorrow I want you to come in at 8am (evil laughter)
Me: Nooooooooooo!
LF: HAHAHAHAH, ok la 12noon la. Can help us buy Three Legs Cooling water?
Me: What on earth is that?!
LF: It's water la. Buy a dozen
Me: ?????
LF: It has a green cap, supermarkets should have
Me: Lol, ok ok, anything else?
LF: SLEEP, NOW, YOU.
Me: OK OK OK BYEEE!

Then I realized the next day after lugging the 12 bottles of cooling water to the studio:

Me: (dumps the 12 bottles on the sofa, and collapses on the sofa)
Mun: (grins) Do you smell anything?
Me: No I got a slight flu, what what?
Mun: (laughs to himself)
Me: OH MY GOODNESS, DURAIN!!!!!
Mun: Yes, we ate hundred bucks worth of it yesterday!!
Me: HAHAHA so that's what the cooling water is for la!
Mun: Yessssssss (takes a styrofoam box out of the fridge), nah we saved some for you!
Me: Yesss!! Thanks (grins)

After finish the first seed:

Mun: You know my dogs like to eat durain?
Me: Seriously?
Mun: Ya they love durian! But Roo doesn't leh
Me: HAHA good, then I can eat it in front of him (if not roo usual runs and attacks food)
Mun: Yeah we gave him the seed yesterday but he didn't seem to respond
Me: Ohh. (Roo comes towards us) Roooooo! (waves the seed in front of him). He seems to stop shocked. (Placed the seed on a paper towel and put it on the chair)
Roo: (Jumps up and starts licking the seed like there is no tomorrow, he even tried to eat the seed. He couldn't because the seed was bigger than his mouth)
Mun: HUHHHHH.
Me: Uhohhhh. Roo loves durain
Mun: Ehhh? Wah I think LF & I cleared almost all of the flesh of the seeds, no wonder he didn't respond
Roo: (Finishes licking all the flesh off the seed and starts running towards my durian)
Me: ROOOOOOOOOO! (picked him off the floor before he reached my durian). Mun, I don't feel safe eating the durinn with roo around.
Mun: HAHAHAHA, ok put him in the toilet first

Oh by the way, roo is my boss's baby cat, it's not much longer than the span of my palm.

Please check out the cover of the sept issue of Reader's Digest in sg– Roo's on the cover, on top of Adrian Pang's head lol. Celebrity ah this durian loving kitten.

Set up the DKNY stuff at paragon already! Tomorrow's the launch! So exciting :D
--

Actions speak volumes where love is concerned
I could preach you a sermon, oh but you would agree
but in my silence would you see God in me?
I'd give you no argument to try to make you believe
Just evidence of the changes in me

king of the jungle

2010-08-01T11:03:00.000+08:00

What is real.

Sunday this way sure is odd. I've got work in awhile, from 1pm-6am to be exact. So unnatural to be this way on a Sunday morning. Still very tired from yesterday's shoot, all over town. Felt like crying most of the day, I don't really know why either, maybe my cramps are on the way. I was just very tired I guess, & it's overwhelming to be shooting on a saturday in orchard rd.

Though Jem's text made me chortle (share with you guys another day). That was probably the only thing besides the cinnamon melts that was smile-worthy. Read Jane Austen's 'Persuasion' while waiting for the time-lapse shots most of the day. Was around all the boutiques, and the sunny yellow wallet from accessorize caught my fancy. Hmm, so did the navy/red print dress at F21. Cash from mabel would cover both nicely. HMM, lol we'd see.

Well the good thing is that coming 6am tomorrow, when I am done shooting– Jem's gonna be back from Taiwan! & I shall catch a few winks in the afternoon & then wait for him to pick me up, and drive out to eat up a frenzy & hear about Taiwan. So thrilled that it's the last of trainings of this nature, no more swarms of bees to battle, ever. Mirthful, yes.
--

People say this world's a jungle
And sometimes I must admit
I'd be scared to death
If I did not know who was king of it
But the truth is –
God created this whole world with His owns hands
So everything is under his command

What I see is telling me this world's gone crazy
But what is real, is God's still on His throne
What I need is to remember one thing–
That the Lord of the gentle breeze is
Lord of the rough & thunder
He's the King of the jungle

Mad shoot

2010-07-30T23:12:00.000+08:00

Been awake for the last 24 hours. Been running around/ carrying things for 15 whole hours. Feet feel like they will implode if I stand on them anymore. Fighting the high winds & rain on the 50th floor, struggling to keep the opened umbrella in place. Multiple ulcers due to lack of water. Haven't eaten for the last 10 hours. Looks exactly like a panda. I am going to sleep. Finally

I want to write about the shoot though, so thought provoking. Tomorrow when I wake up that is...

sam's concert

2010-07-29T20:42:00.000+08:00

Releve; SRJC Dance Concert

BLAST. The choreography for their dances were damn good. It was such a pity to put a gold with honors dance troupe in a school LT, should have been at the esplanade, nevertheless they did great. Sam did great :D She's sooooo tall. Before her dance, someone from the other end of the LT (we suspect it was pat, lol) shouted: "GO SAMANTHA!!!" super loudly, like way over all the rest of the cheering. And siyi replied: "YES!!!!" equally loudly. The vice-principal then replied: "Yes, I'm sure samantha loves you..." lol

Gus came for siyi & we were all driven to chomp chomp for supper! Steady, I love it how everyone around me suddenly is able to drive, so I get driven around, haha. Diving license first though muahaha (when I told Mun & LF (my bosses), they were like "Dying license?!!!!!! DON'T DIE! PLEASEEEE!!" lol). We had oujian, and satay & hokkien mee, carrot cake & giant mugs of sugarcane. Love spending time with them, really wish every single day was like this.

& sammy, we will stand by you if anything happens. Call us whenever for anything ok, love you!

--

More reasons to practice & hone my photoshopping skills. Easy mooolah yo, that's 50 for half an hour's work.

Ok off to catch a few winks before the 4am shoot zzzzzzzzzzzzzz. Mun: "How do you like our schedule?" mega-big-grin. zzzzzzzzzz. Keep me in prayer for strength! Tomorrow's shoot at 2am. Sunday's shoot from 3pm- 6am (no I did not type the AM & PMs wrongly). GO OWLSSS!!

--

Every step I take
Is a step of faith
No weapon formed against me shall prosper

Every prayer I make
Is a prayer of faith
For if my God is for me
Then who can be against me?

domesticated.

2010-07-27T23:33:00.000+08:00

Domesticated

feeling slightly domesticated.

Cooked a whole pot of century egg porridge in the evening & left for a meeting in church.

I like my porridge chunky & rich, with lots of ingredients & shallots. Thin porridge is only for when someone falls sick. I got this message in the middle of my meeting:

:)
--

Lately I've been craving Coconut Ice.

Should try making them one day.

--

Mun sent me to print the DKNY covers. Then told me to chill & get a massage since he wasn't back at the office yet. So I went, meandering through the shops in town. Got a teal dress from Zara at a whooping $16.95! Browsed through many books at borders too, had to quickly get myself out of there before I started buying up the bookshop. Met Chris for lunch at Quiznos! Headed back to the studio shortly after.

Dabbled with the new printer Mun bought. He was sick & knocked out on the couch, so I did the setting up & test prints for the DKNY covers. Woke him up to check & he was very pleased with the results & thinks that I'm very neat, lol. Hilarious because err, my bestfriend will tell you that I am a far cry from neat. Call time tomorrow at 8am, I have a feeling we're shooting 300 wine bottles... darn product shoots, shall heed Long Fei's advice to sit in the swirly chair & shift the bottles that way, muahaha :)

Increasingly excited about the youth camp that is approaching– come end of the year. So much installed, much larger budget than for usual events, so there's so much space for really cool stuff, moving the camp out of church (finally, lol), tees etc. Plus it's gonna be like 4 or 5 times bigger than Fusion Camp, with the BB folks and all. Wait up for publicity to kick into gear guys! I'm sure it's gonna be a blast :D
--

Here is my heart
Make it your sanctuary
For nobody else but Jesus

coral flats

2010-07-26T22:53:00.000+08:00

Second week into internship! Every day is so different, I find myself shifting my perception or developing new ones every time.

My bosses were extraordinarily in a good mood today, I think. When I came in, they asked me how my weekend was & what I did. When I mentioned that we ate escargots, one of them was very enthusiastic about it (both of them are huge foodies). Then other then whined– "Sueeeee, why you tell him? Now he's going to talk about it for the whole day until we get to eat itttttt" lol

They were super uber nice, and they were already very fine bosses to begin with. We had breakfast after reaching the location for the shoot, early. Prata! Oh my, the prata was twice as large as normal ones, and the same price! I got one plain one, then my boss told me I should try the egg one, so he cut some of his & gave me. Then he realized that there wasn't much egg in the portion he gave me, so he cut somemore for me? Which boss does that?! Which boss shares his prata with you please? Then he brought me to the back to see how the made the curry etc, in this like bathtub-sized pots... Like excursion lol. Seriously, super good mood.

When they carried equipment, they passed me the lightest stuff. & once we reached they place, they took the items from me. Then later on during lunch, my other boss asked me if I wanted a drink. I thought he was going to buy for everyone, so I said– Ok, green tea thanks! He went all the way to the drinks stall & back, just to buy green tea, for me only. The whole time they were teasing me about my work behavior etc. Oh did I mention, that they keep paying for all the meals I eat while within work hours? Blessed beyond measure.

Work is serious stuff thought, we won they DKNY job so it's time for production! Got to edit some stuff & send it to the printers tomorrow! The rest of the weeks is pretty packed, with mad working hours. Mad as in irregular & unearthly, like 4am in the morning, 7pm-6am? Lol yes, because we are shooting time-lapse. Gonna be an exciting week :D Oh but, got to miss service & cell this sunday :( Got a shoot... ahh I miss my cell
--

Coral. I suddenly seem to be very in love with that color.

Like somewhere between orange & red.

--

Every breath that I take
Every moment I'm awake
Lord have Your way in me

dinner with gloria

2010-07-24T21:39:00.003+08:00

Garlic butter escargots & a friend

Met gloria for dinner!! Escargots & pasta & chicken wingss. Hee haven't seen her since forever. Caught up about stuff from then till now :) Everyone's growing up, we're growing up. Gloria, we need to bake cookies at your house again, when you shift back && got for maad!! :D

things i'm doing

2010-07-22T23:49:00.000+08:00

Things I did today:

Recce-ing Arab St & Haji Lane with the 5D Mark II. Was looking for colorful stuff
Spoke to a fabric dealer about the idiosyncrasies of rain
Cut out the beige background for the DKNY shoot (guess who did the layouts for the pitch? & we won the job with it yay!)
Picked Roo (boss's baby cat) up & cradled him on his back, when he ran to greet me at the gate.
Slurped down The Soup Spoon's Chicken Ragout Soup (for free! soupaholic yo), with tamz & jamie.
Strolled through borders with the girls, soaked up the musty smell of books. Walking into bookstores like this always make me very very happy (anyway, isn't it amazing how ALL of the seven love to read? Like every single one of them). A pity though, borders didn't have the book I wanted to buy.
Got my nails painted a peaceful lilac. Tammy got a her's in rainbow glitter. Jamie's toes took on a light sparkly pink shade, & she told everyone "Do not step on my toes, literally. Pun intended" lol. Love meeting the girls :D
Forwarded Jamie's message about the XLB buffet gathering to Jem & he can go yay!
Decided to join the guys to watch the movie on Saturday. Got to make time to chill with the cell guys before they all slowly disappear for army!

--

You are the peace that guards my heart
My help in times of need
You are the hope that leads me on
And brings me to my knees

nelson & gina leave for new zealand

2010-07-21T23:48:00.000+08:00

Nelson & Gina leave for New Zealand

The couple just left for 6 months for discipleship training school in New Zealand! Love the sense of adventure & passion they have, I think very few people nowadays will uproot & give up their city life to do something of this nature. Gonna miss having them around in church, serving alongside them in worship.

rawr

2010-07-20T20:27:00.002+08:00

RAWR.

Some days, you just need a hug & no one's around.
--

So vicious. It's one of the things that irk me the most– Someone ruining something, that I've perfectly done/ planned/ crafted, on purpose. Maybe I'm overly upset about the delay, but it's just not perfect anymore & I'd pretend it's nothing, but really, it makes me want to cry. I meant for that to look perfect, feel perfect, be there in perfect time. aksdjkasfhjsh.

Jason sent me this link (http://www.maxwangerblog.com/?p=2787) & said: "I bet you'd love this sus". I click on it, look at the pictures; they were beautiful, didn't want the pictures to run out, but they did. When I came to the last one, I felt a drop of water on my thigh, it jolted me out of my thoughts. Many more kept following, and it was useless to wipe them away. It reminded me of the rain, and how my heart was in my stomach, and there was no taxi to be found and the world just slowed down to stop-motion, 2 frames per second, everything seems to turn into a black & white movie, & time was crushing, with the final printouts in hand. Starkly in contrast to these blissful photos... Jason asks me what I thought of them, __________. Much too painful to look again.
--

Lord I love You
No matter what I see
No matter what I hear
No matter what my seem to be

Lord I love You
No matter what I know
No matter how the winds of life may blow
This one thing I know–
That you are faithful

internship

2010-07-17T23:19:00.001+08:00

Internship
(with T2 pictures, under fashion/ commercial photographers Munster & Long Fei)

“Fashion is not something that exists in dresses only. Fashion is in the sky, in the street, fashion has to do with ideas, the way we live, what is happening.”
–Coco Chanel

Cheese. So friday was one of the most drama-packed days of my entire life so far. First day helping out with mun + long fei's shoot for teenage magazine. Mun & Long Fei are my bosses, internship at T2 Pictures, officially starts this monday, but they needed help for this shoot so I was meandering through the rain, towards the vintage toy haven of 42 Bassorah St. early friday morning.

Met the crew all camping outside the locked toy museum, wasn't really sure if I was at the right place, didn't see mun or long fei. Texted Mun. He called me & told me he was eating breakfast nearby, asked if I wanted anything & to go say hi to the crew & introduce myself. Was anticipating this sense of slight uneasiness as I headed over, however I was remarkably calm about it (must be all that crazy shuffling in design school, so immune to meeting new people already). The rest of it was history...

Mun & Long Fei are very focused when shooting. In spite of that, I found myself pretty looked after. When the diffuser stand didn't work out, he asked me to help hold up the diffuser, so I did, but he came over and leaned it against the wall so I didn't have to really hold it up, just hold it in place. They don't forget about me, or make me do menial work (they're the ones who are carrying all the heavy stuff), instead I'm required to be smack in the middle of the action, looking at how the shots are turning out while taking care of the mac, or going up to the toy museum to 'look look' with them. Mun made me go with them & the crew for lunch, and paid for it. & teased me with the editor of teeange. Not even counting the lift to town & my amazing job scope. Yes, I believe my bosses are way awesome :D

Well then where's the drama I was talking about right? The drama all came from their clients & crew. First thing I noticed when I arrived, was the chirpy make-up artist teaching the model from Holland how to spew vulgarities in Mandarin. In the afternoon, the feisty stylist got into quite a war of words with the owner of a particular teddy bear store, when she made noise about us shooting at the storefront. The editor later on quipped that the owner probably hadn't got laid in 5 years, so she was venting it out on us? & they are not really fond of children, evident when they raise their voices at these school kids who blocked out way while shooting, not to mention the teens/ adults who did too, later on. But through working with them, besides all the cultural shock, I sincerely think they are nice people by nature? Just, misguided maybe?

Though one thing that I couldn't really understand, was this general vibe that working with them, in this industry, in this line, places me with them, on a superior level as compared to any other common person. Among the many things the stylist yelled at the store owner, one phrase summed up & solidified the vibe I got from this whole fashion stint– "You are nothing!". Everyone else cannot match up to them, everyone else not working with us becomes commonplace, trash. That startled me.

Well, hopefully this fashion industry isn't as complex as it seems to be. I'm glad my bosses are really nice. OH OH I MUST TELL YOU ABOUT MY JOB SCOPE :) I am supposed to help them with photog, come down and help out for shoots, play L4D with them, teach them how to play the guitar, eat good food with them, play with their baby kitten & take care of it. Lol, yeah these three months are gonna be quite intriguing yes?

This is as real as it gets– circular vs Christianity.
--

Show me how to live
Teach me how to pray
May all I do & say please You Lord
Show me how to live
Teach me in Your ways
So I can walk with You all my days

week end + monday blues

2010-07-13T23:25:00.000+08:00

Flea market + maple milkshake + crepes

Everyone quite engrossed, talking to Jem about uni options. Luke more engrossed in ashley.

Love how the guys all came down too.

Time spent with seven's always very therapeutic.

Highlights of the weekend:

Finishing 2nd phase of presentations for both ad campaign & mmfund.
Lunch with Jem at Out Of The Pan, awesome waffles & crepes!
Helping ashley at the Flea Market, meeting the girls + their guys
Trying the maple milkshake from Once Upon A Milkshake, with Jamie
TCM family meeting, very encouraged by Nelson & Gina.
Crashing glow's & laughing at the guys' stoned expressions while they were playing FIFA
Watching 'Despicable Me' with the older youth
Watching 'Toy Story 3' with Jem

Woke up today to see Jem's message; he landed safely in Taiwan.

Then I checked my email & had a very good laugh :p

Man, shoulders are aching like crazy. That drains the most energy out of me really, absolutely cannot concentrate properly when shoulders are aching. Shot a little more with jamie & marcus in the morning. Like early in the morning at Mustafa... Was talking to him over lunch about perspectives, people, purpose, God, Christianity. Sure was interesting. We went back to school & crash for about 2hours. I woke up to the sound of swift clicks of a canon shutter & opened my eyes to see Jin taking pictures of me sleeping?! Grrrr, I will get Jin one day.

Shot with kathy. Jin nearly lost his 1D + 7D + tele lens, the blur guy left his camera bag on the table outside the LT, it's amazing how we ate lunch + went away for more than half an hour & it was still there? Thank God man!! Stayed for more in the VSC studio to finish up print ads. Marcus went to edit the TVC. He came back with Jin & when Jin saw my psychedelic ads, he was like "WOW, marcus look! That's damn nice!" Haha, cheap thrill :)

More work tomorrow, I foresee camping at ps. Keep us in prayer man, the last leg of submission & no more lessons forever more?
--

& I will love You all my life
For You are my reason
The one that I live for

A home for You

2010-07-07T22:54:00.000+08:00

"Sorry I am being so over-emotional I am always over-emotional. Even if I don't show it my internal organs are in actual fact always functioning in an over-emotional mode.

I am not feeling very good recently. I'm not exactly sad... I just... How do I put this across... I just feel too much to the extent that I don't know what I'm feeling anymore? Like a computer that hangs at CPU Usage 100%. Everything around me seems overpowering. Reality is overpowering."
–Zhou

So I was telling her on tuesday that I completely understood what she was saying because that was how I was feeling these past few days.

I think it's essential to feel. I was talking to andrew on the way to school today & he thinks that sometimes we feel too much. I nodded, because it was logically correct. But I was really thinking to myself –how important it is to really feel, without feelings you cease to be real, you cease to live. You cease to live, to really live.
--

Finished shooting, with a 7D. Playing with Jin's tele & 1D in the middle of the CBD, painfully beautiful colors & rendering. So tempted to switch to canon. Film film, I will play with film first. Kudos to Jamie, Dot, Marcus & Jin. I love how marcus & I have our own really close friends that are willing to help us out with this project. Love all you guys

Time to stay awake all night.
Oh my dear aching shoulders; go to sleep.
--

Come and be everything I am
& all I know
Search me through & through
Till my heart becomes a home for You

my deepest praise I give to You

2010-07-06T23:45:00.000+08:00

My deepest praise I give to You

Lately I am...

feeling good about: crossing things off my to-do list.
not feeling good about: how my to-do list is still mysteriously growing

feeling good about: the positive feedback for our ad campaign ideas
not feeling good about: the mountain of work we have to finish for ad campaign

feeling good about: slowly resolving the saga & the sincere emails
not feeling good about: how he needs to leave for Taiwan soon

feeling good about: how my girls flew over with icecream, hugs & all the love in the world
not feeling good about: how I don't get to see them very often now

feeling good about: the healthier food I've been eating recently, fruits & veggies?
not feeling good about: the kettle chips & junk food that I've also been consuming recently.

--

"To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket- safe, dark, motionless, airless--it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable." — C.S. Lewis

Very tired. The weekend was completely insane. Recovered soon enough with the girls to the rescue & resolving it later etc. Emails will suffice for now. So terribly tired out by production week. Just came back from shooting the ad campaign viral video. Only friends like my girls will come right away to help me with things like that, within short notice, being absolutely sporting. Love you Jamie & Dot! There is none like them, completely irreplaceable & indispensable. Work all the way this week, please keep me in prayer!
--

Your love for me is never-ending
My heart is yearning to find You
Jesus you're my deepest love
My only desire is to be found in You

Let my heart be wholly surrendered to You

paper cut

2010-07-02T23:02:00.001+08:00

Paper cut

Well so I just rejected 2902 Gallery and took up the T2 internship. Ughhhh, I don't know if this is the worse choice I've ever made but I'm really going by gut feeling this time– Munster & the guys at T2 were really sincere and unpretentiously nice, and I do really think I'd learn more at T2 in the studio than with Gwen & 2902 helping out with the Singapore Photography Festival stuff? I mean T2 has a baby cat walking around, how rad is that! :p Na but really, I mean 2902 is a famous gallery etc, it'd look great on portfolio to be working on the Singapore Photography Festival but, I'd learn significantly lesser about taking photos than I would with T2.

On an experimental note, I need to get my diana or supersampler asap. I need to feel film, it's so differently humanistic; painting with light & dreaming on paper, relaxing & soothing. This foray into film is gonna be expensive again, photography can at times be so costly.
--

"Today morning I walked out of my house and decided that I wanted to feel sad, since I just finished The History of Love, which was very sad. The book was sad, and the fact that I just finished the book was also very sad. The feeling I get every time I finish a book, is as if a close friend of mine just walked away after pasting a farewell note on the wall of my heart. Even if I try to reread the book the same old friend will never return again. Everything has a first time. First times are always the most precious and unforgettable. I think."
– Zhou

--

you need to talk to me.
--

Bring me anything that brings You glory
& I know there are some days when this life brings me pain
But if that's what it takes to praise You
Jesus bring the rain

more cramps

2010-06-30T21:55:00.001+08:00

On a roll these days & my awful cramps are working up again (I mean my cramps are usually bad but this was like three times worse), this time accompanied by a spiteful flu . Took a turn for the worse this morning, went to the doc's. Just as I sat down, someone called out "sus?", & my bestfriend walks in. Sometimes I think we're telepathic; she was on her way to buy tofu. It was beyond comforting just for her to be there. We spoke about lots of stuff, before she had to rush home & go to school for her bio paper, she made me feel a lot better even before I stepped into the doc's, love. Well my dear doctor declared that she thinks my cramps are very stress & fatigue related, she then ordered me to stay home the rest of the day to rest.

Back home mommy had this evil smelling brew of chinese herbs? No it is not the sweet smelling kind of chinese soup I love. Its the black & strange smelling type, the type that looks murky, with all the sediments of herbs etc. I stared at it for quite some time, as if something sinister was gonna burst out of the soup any minute. Managed to swallow everything in the end, it didn't taste half as bad as I thought it would, thankfully.
--

Fluctuating everything. I miss my girls. Note to self: Cheer self up.
--

There is none like You
No one else can touch my heart like You do
I could search for all eternity long & find
There is none like You

may you live all the days of your life

2010-06-29T23:49:00.001+08:00

“May you live all the days of your life.” Jonathan Swift
--

So do you ever have a day where you feel like you may be drowning a bit? I'm having one of those. Muscles are aching in everywhere especially my shoulders, woke up this morning & had to try a second time to open my door (which scared me, I mean, I can't even open my door?! I didn't know I was that tired!), I haven't slept in more than 3 hours in the last 24 hours, my sister's hamster died, I had a presentation for ad campaign today & did I mention that I have another presentation for mmfund tomorrow morning? (actually, I think it may be the onslaught of the cramps & my mood swings and emotions are getting the best of me)

The best part of my day was obviously meeting all my dear friends from sjcp again. It always warms my heart to see them. Immediate hugs from more than 10 people, self-explanatory yes? The surprise teasing attack, well... apparently fb is universal. It's always so so good to see them lol. Certain comments dropped here & there were a huge encouragement to me (in terms of my writing & photography). Though the presentations about the last trip down just made me cry. Everything else pales in comparison to the magnitude of the situation we're dealing with here, I mean, what's a presentation worth when lives are at stake. It's always such a dilemma being stuck here

html, crabs & All Saint's church event

2010-06-27T22:59:00.000+08:00

Html, crabs & Mt Faber

It's been a heart-stopping, mind-blowing, shoulders + forearms + legs + everything is aching, fascinating, soul-baring week. From dealing with crazy html, css, etc for web design, to running around Mustafa with Marcus (groupmate) interviewing people (which was by the way, absolutely amusing & refreshing), to dancing with the rest at glow's house & watching him play a video game till 11pm, to eating awesome durian icecream with the best people in the world, to frantically draw with sparklers at Labrador Park, to being at the Jurong Fishery Port at 3am sloshing through the fish juice on the floor, at eating prata at 4am, at being at the top of Mt Faber at 7am– watching the sunrise with the All Saints youth & singing with vincent + my ukulele, at nath being very amused at how tired I was, then saying "Good Morning Sus!" & laughing his head off at me.

Super tired, but it's been awesome. Then there's the Cze Char outing with the guys to celebrate bing's return to Singapore; that I've been looking forward to for weeks! Salted egg crab sauce is love. Was also really good catching up with the older folks, especially bings!

Look at the exposed pincer meat please :D

Hmm looks like we got the 'playing with our food' in common lol

Had much needed soul conversations with someone. Glad we managed to sort things out, it's much clearer now what we're heading towards, how we think, what we should/ shouldn't be doing etc. Was really good, although at some moments there were tears, words caught in mid-air; at the end we both had lighter hearts, wider smiles. I'm really thankful we aren't the sort to argue to win, to defend ourselves; but rather to learn, seeking to understand and be understood. We have much to discover & learn about & I'm so relieved we are willing to make that choice to step back, it's not gonna be the easiest thing, but I'm pretty confident we have what it takes to get through this. Not so much of being unscattered though the process, but being able to grow through it.
--

By the way I cannot understand how Mr Partner-for-group-work can run through the streets of Little India with me, interviewing people etc & I totally crash afterward at home, from sheer fatigue. While he, goes to the SAM (the art museum) & performs a kickass set with josh. (watch it here)

On the topic of guitars & guitarists. I really cannot take the constant nonsense because of round back guitars & my own guitar dying, delaying the team etc. I know I need a new guitar but... ughh at least I managed to finally speak to Brandon, a break should be good. Anyway there's fyp & internship coming up, gonna be as busy as a bee.
--

Glowy's right about what he said. This is very _____________, though.
--

When all my strength has turned to fear
When I wonder if You're near

I know You're by my side

2010-06-22T22:16:00.002+08:00

Gosh, if it is what I think it is...........

monologue

2010-06-22T21:15:00.002+08:00

Monologues &

This week, I got down to writing out what was on my mind; even through I wasn't in my writing mode/ mood. I hate writing when I'm not in my writing mode/ mood. Those paragraphs always end up so inaccurate, so poorly crafted, so void of emotion, such a far cry from the real issues & happenings. They end up scratching just the surface; an incomplete and incoherent mess of parts. But I had no choice, it was too much to stomach & grapple with. Sending it might not have been wise. Nevertheless, we are made to stop running away & I really pray we come through this.
--

"You better shape up,
'cause I need a man
and my heart is set on you.
You better shape up;
you better understand
to my heart I must be true. "

– You're the one that I want; Grease

I need new songs. Mixtapes anyone? It's a funny I-never-expected-so-many-things week. Never thought I'd write that email. Never thought I'd partner marcus for ad campaign. Never thought I'd be asked to turn up at 2902 for an interview. Never thought I'd really want to get a 5D Mark II. Never thought I'd be heading to ecp in the middle of the week. Never thought I'd be going to a youth group from another church I've never been to before, to help play host. Never thought I'd be amongst the top 5 cooperate identity designers for some government competition thing, out of the 126 over submissions. & I did it 10minutes before my uncle came to pick up the boards for submission, only because he insisted I participate. Never thought

There's so much to be done, & this very last month of classes are tough stuff. After this, it's internship + fyp all the way till graduation.

I want to watch Toy Story 3

In the chaos in confusion
I know You're sovereign still
In the moment of my weakness
You give me grace to do Your will

Galleries are romantic

2010-06-19T22:49:00.000+08:00

So romantic. Galleries are such atas places, deep soothing vibe.

I'd write more when I've gathered my thoughts + feelings. Love you guys
--

When im alone the world is such a different place
Sometimes its hard to keep the smile upon my face
It seems like I try so hard and still I let you down
Its taken so long but now there's one thing that I've found

When everything starts crashing down
When all I know falls to the ground
When darkness comes and I can't see
You're always there to rescue me
When all my strength has turned to fear
When I wonder if you're near
When I don't know how to break free
You're always there to rescue me

I wonder if I'll make it through this darkest night
I need to know your strength in me gonna win this fight
I'm reaching out wont you take my hand show me to the light
I know you're by my side

last day of kids camp!

2010-06-12T23:01:00.005+08:00

Concert & paper cuts

Finale of Son Rock Kid's Camp! The falcons did really well, even though the music for their song got cut off suddenly. Everyone sang along for the last chorus to cheer them on! The awards made them grin from ear to ear, they were showing them off to each other. They found out Marcus's weak spot– his hair! So they were jumping around trying to touch his hair, and he was like ducking & jumping so they'd not be able to, talk about hilarious...

Talking to parents about their kids, is a silently very unnerving formality. Jack asked me again if I was married, Jody overheard & asked me after he left– "Is he hitting on you?!" LOL love my dear falcons. Well I hope there was a seed planted & that they will somehow really know what it means to travel this trail of life with such glorious hope & joy.

Started on the printing of camp booklets for Fusion Camp! Thank God for the youth that stayed back to help, really blessed by you guys. The printing was a tedious job because of the settings, formats, printers etc. Very thankful for gabriel & elijah who came over from bb camp to help with bulk of the folding, cutting, matching up to my perfectionism. I know they were sincerely helping because they were game enough to sew when I asked them to :p Yes, needle + thread kind of sew hehe. Completely amusing stuff, watching the two officers struggle to slide the thread into the eye of the needle, keeping the thread in place, listening to them hammering away with me to bind the booklets & of course the satisfaction of finishing the binding process. Supper-ed at kp, good chill out time with them, thanks guys! Appreciate it much.

--

Wow so tired. Thank God everything is pretty much done for Fusion Camp yay! :D It's gonna be such an interesting time, first such camp in church. So so blessed by Son Rock Kid's Camp, songs still ringing in my head. Got to switch mode to youth camp asap through, lol.

--

As we travel the trail of life
We're never alone
Never out of Your sight
We know that You'd see us through
Cause You always do
You hold our hands tight
As we travel the trail of life

3rd day of Son Rock Kid's camp

2010-06-11T23:29:00.001+08:00

To laugh & love & live

Third day of Son Rock Kid's Camp! Dear falcons soaring all over the place... super energetic la the oldest ones lol. I realized that it's really different, taking the oldest kids vs the youngest kids. Different strategy altogether man. With the younger ones, wrong is wrong, right is right & they listen and obey more quickly than the older ones. With these dear falcons of mine, they require you to earn respect, and understand their vast ocean of emotions. They also want reason & are indignant when scolded (unlike the young ones, who run around and forget after awhile). They thrive when given responsibility & revel in encouragement. It's been pretty interesting with them, thankfully they are the good sort, eager to please, no problematic ones.

Was really tired after camp through. Still had to go down to get the camp booklet stuff + food stuff for Fusion Camp next week. Super uber thankful for Marcus Ng who came to help me! There is no way I could have lugged those 8 bags of groceries back to church myself. & also mel who stayed back with us to label the stuff. At least one thing off my list! Now to print + bind the Fusion Camp Booklets tomorrow! It's a lot more tedious a task than you think! I need to like manually arrange the pages imposition & cut the corners & bind etc. It's not just printing! So uhhh, whoever has time to help me, by all means please stay back to help me after the kid's camp!! :D
--

OH MY GOODNESSS! I AM SO EXCITED FOR ROY haha. Ok secret secret, I'm sure he'd want to be the first one to tell Jem & the churchies. But I cannot help by feel extremely excited for him! lol he really deserves it, got the makings of it. Just had a short chat with him, super good catching up with the funny fella, & oh boy does he know about some hush hush stuff lol

Finishing the last bit of the camp booklet + minor changes. Yawns, it's gonna be a tiring but pretty eventful week ahead! Feet hurt. But as yahui always told us– "Lets have soft hearts & hard feet!" Soft hearts to love & care, hard feet to go wherever we are needed. Wisdom ya, have a great week folks!
--

May each beat of my heart
Beat in time with yours
May the words that I speak
Be the words You say

I reach for you Lord with every breath I take
You complete me Lord
And here with You is where I long to stay

Son Rock Kids Camp Day 1

2010-06-09T22:07:00.000+08:00

Falcons love eating Waffle Crisp

Falcons! (oo! oo!), first day of camp :p For the first half of the day, The Falcons (the oldest kids, pri 5&6's) were all acting cool ya, lol as usual for the oldest kids at camp. Managed to get them to warm up by leaps & bounds by lunch, oh yeah! Interesting stuff from today:

1) My dear little falcons eat lots & lots of chilli?? It is true, I took like about 6 chinese-soup-spoonfuls & it still wasn't enough for them, by that time the camp counselors had already devoured the rest of the chilli lol.

2) After snack time we had some free time before closing assembly so the station guides asked the kids to fill up a page in their work book about themselves & their friends etc. It was for them to get to know each other better. There answers to one question made me smile, couldn't help it :p "What do you like most about your group counselor?", "Her smile" wah swoon lol

3) "Che Che Susanna, are you married?", "HUHHHHH? No? lol", "Do you have a boyfriend?", "Errr, no?", "Ok (grins)" HAHHAHAHHAHA, kids say the darnest things la lol. Reminds me of Thailand mission trip marriage proposals...

4) Ok you see, I knew it was gonna be tiring at camp & sometimes you just need a snack for sugar rush. So the day before camp, I got a box of my favourite cereal– Waffle Crisp (fyi: 2nd favourite– Fruity Pebbles, 3rd– Blueberry Morning :p ), poured some into a ziplock bag & brought it with me to camp. Since I had quite a bit left at the end, I gave my little falcons some...

Then omgoodness, they went crazy about it. Like they were dying for more lol. Marcus totally helped to fire up their waffle crisp strike & instead of cheering- "Falcons!" they went, "biscuits!", haha I shall bring some more for them tomorrow & only give it to them when they are good. See– Waffle Crisp is some awesome stuff! lol

Kids are so very funny & endearing, looking forward to day 2 of camp! :)
--

Reminder to self: Get all stuff needed for Fusion Camp!
--

How great is the love the Father has lavished on us
That we should be called– children of God!

Four duets I must sing in this lifetime

2010-06-08T22:53:00.001+08:00

Four duets I must learn to sing in this lifetime–

One Desire, by Lenny LeBlanc
Paperweight, by Joshua Radin and Schuyler Fisk
At The Beginning, by Richard Marx and Donna Lewis
Penny & Me, by Hanson

Something magical about duets.
--

Sun Rock Kid's Camp starts tomorrow! Camps are always a blast, what more a kid's camp :p Everything sent to the printer's today, thank God it took less time than expected. Shopping with mel & yj for Fusion Camp stuff after that lol. It's like one camp after another. From tomorrow on, it's camps all the way till sera's concert, then our exhibition! Keep us all in prayer, mad rush more than anything really lol. But a fun kind of mad rush I guess :p After all it's all the stuff I love, concerts, exhibitions at art galleries, camps, kids...

Gonna go through gina's songs before the week passes me by. I tell you I am completely floored at how God works through music & lyrics. Gina chose a 'new' song for this week, funny thing was that it was an old song to me & one of my favourites during my secondary school days. Every time I hear certain songs, I'd at once be whisked away to where I was, feel what I was feeling, see what I was seeing when I first heard the song. I don't know if you guys know what I mean but yeah, & these vibes can get so strong, moving me to tears most of the time. Was very encouraged by the strength of conviction I remembered having when singing the song, the faithfulness of God during that period, very uplifting. Glad we're singing it in church this week, refreshing.
--

You're my Prince of Peace
& I will live my life for You

monday elephant tees

2010-06-07T23:31:00.002+08:00

Monday Elephants

Last meeting for Fusion Camp yesterday! Everything finalized, ordered, sent out. Pretty darn excited. There's children's camp this week too :D Must hopefully get all the exhibition stuff done asap. Chillout time at brandon & elaine's. Their children never fail to make me smile & laugh, so endearing & real. You really cannot help but love those little grubby fingers, bright eyes & playful smiles– especially when you have the youngest one snuggling comfortably in your lap, as if it was a chair, her brother leaning on your right shoulder, and their oldest sister on your left shoulder playing with your hair, all excitedly telling you about their pictures in an iphone. (aww)

Had dinner with the guys at HK cafe, gonna miss the cellies when they go off for army! Oh & reminder to self: Grab french toast with somebody when he comes back! :p
--

Monday elephants on off-white tanks.

Exhibition works all beginning, everyone down to the printer's tomorrow, then on to the framers. L2 space Gallery at Keppel. Exhibition opening 17th June @ 7pm-9pm! Guys keep the date free thanks :p
--

Savior, please take my hand
I work so hard, I live so fast
This life begins, and then it ends
And I do the best that I can, but I don't know how long I'll last

I try to be so tough
But I'm just not strong enough
I can't do this alone, God I need You to hold on to me
I try to be good enough
But I'm nothing without Your love
Savior, please keep saving me

Savior, please help me stand
I fall so hard, I fade so fast
Will You begin right where I end
And be the God of all I am because You're all I have

Hallelujah
Everything You are to me
Is everything I'll ever need
And I am learning to believe
That I don't have to prove a thing
'Cause You're the one who's saving me

short break

2010-06-05T22:02:00.001+08:00

Submission for the block is over! Finally a breather, though only a momentary one. Met marcus yesterday at Ion to go steal a look at some stuff from zara, eye-candy! Got cakes + buns that the family absolutely loves; from provence! Love the bakery Provence, if you're tired from shopping & need something more substantial than a snack but not a full meal, they have the best toasty-chesse-melting-over-luncheon-meat sandwiches :D We left shortly for HK cafe at Kovan, soul food time!

Ease-the-blues-away-time on this journal. I love summer even though Singapore isn't a temperate country! Everyone just somehow decides to add a little more color to what they wear, and I think we all can use something bright & colorful everyday. New favourite colors to wear– coral, cannery yellow, mustard, turquoise, aqua, seafoam green, dusty pink, nude, orange.

Relentlessly attracted by pretty things; aesthetics. I cannot decide if it's a good thing– that my eyes have been conditioned to be sharp about the details that make fine art & design (integral part of becoming a better designer), or be appalled at my penchant towards only the aesthetically pleasing. Even to the extent of getting quite impatient & disgusted by poor design. I've become more critical & judging about aesthetics as a whole, essentially everything I can see– not just the design of bookcovers, posters, banners, flyers, anything in print. Not very healthy.

:) Just got this from jolyn. Made my day, she's so sweet & endearing. & the good sort of sincere. You know nowadays people tend to excuse the lack of self-control by saying that they are just being real & sincere? Excuses for mindless decisions & to justify just about anything they want to do. But the true, real, pure kind of sincerity can only be found in few now. Jolyn's one of the few. I don't quite know how to describe it; but you can tell that what she says is from her heart. She's really been a blessing to me throughout my poly years :)

--

Alright back to work, camp booklet. Super uber tired. Can't wait for hols to come & for 3 people to coming back from overseas!
--

Whom shall I fear
For I am Yours